Category Archives: Uncategorized

The Imprint – Excerpt from IN UTERO documentary

The science of multigenerational trauma, showing how stress is passed on in utero, imprinting the foetus with the trauma and stress the Mother experiences during pregnancy and that which has not been dealt with from the previous generations.  (2:50 mins)

Here is the link to read the whole Huffington Post article by Kathleen Man Gyllenhaal and Stephen Gyllenhaal titled ‘In sickness and in health, it all begins in the womb‘.

Further videos and articles explaining intergenerational trauma and how to heal it, are provided on the Intergenerational Trauma page of this website.

How childhood trauma affects health across a lifetime

In this short video Nadine Burke Harris explains how adverse childhood experiences impacts the health of the child and continues to do so over the lifetime of the person. She explains in scientific terms why this occurs and ways the impacts can be reduced. She believes that this is a public health issue and should be addressed as such with multidisciplinary teams available to help affected individuals to heal the trauma and reduce the impacts.

How to let yourself be your whole self?

When you have suffered a painful start to life you bury your true self inside under layers and layers of protection. The innocent part of you is wrapped up safely, hidden away and kept under wraps for fear that exposing it will result in more pain, loss or abandonment.

This makes it very difficult to know who you are and to live your life with joy. Basically, you walk around with a gaping hole in your heart as part of you, the core part of you is missing in action. It is simply not there, disowned, buried, ignored and left in the dark.

This results in a sense of emptiness and loss that cannot be filled by material objects or worldy pursuits. No matter what you achieve or do, you still feel empty and like something is missing, beacause it is. You are missing, the truest part of who you are, the indivdual, unique aspects of you.

We often modify who we are to fit in to different situations. We show different parts of ourself or aspects of us to different people and situations. At work you may be smart, responsible, friendly, helpful, kind and thoughtful. At home with friends you may be more casual, relaxed and playful. On the sport field you may be more rambunctious, competitive and blood thirsty. With your kids you are hopefully gentle, loving, kind and attentive.

But how are you when you are with yourself? Do you sit quietly and listen within to hear what it is your heart needs? Do you even know that your heart speaks to you or your inner child? Do you give yourself any time in the day to be with you? Do you even know what it is that you really like to do? What activities make your heart sing? What is it that you thoroughly enjoy doing, where time just flies past and you feel really peaceful and complete afterwards? These are things your true self, your unique self likes to do, things that fill your emotional needs up, they fill up your cup of life, your reserves and fuel for completing the rest of the tasks you need to do in your day to day busyness.

If you are not taking the time to listen to and meet your heart’s needs, then it is likely that your cup is close to empty. You may feel drained, exhausted and wondering whether it is worth the effort doing all the things you do. You are probably craving change, but not sure how to go about it or if you have the energy to try.

reading in natureUncover who you really are and sing through life. Make time for your true self and true desires and you will feel much better. It doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive. Your heart’s desire may be for long walks in nature; to simply sit and read a book; to play with your dog; to cook a nice meal; to watch the sunset; to play sport; to spend time with friends; to eat chocolate cake while savouring every bite and letting it ooze down your throat.

Slowly, simply living life, enjoying it more fully, being present to each moment as it goes by. Less stress, less rush, less fuss and bother, less worry or forcing things to happen, less controlling and mind chatter. Just relax below that, slow your breath and drop into your heart centre, listen to it, it will tell you what you need to be happier and more fulfilled.

As you meet your own needs you become more of who you truly are, as you are allowing it back to the surface. It doesn’t matter if others don’t like doing what you like doing. It doesn’t matter whether you can only do it for an hour a day or an afternoon a week. What matters is you take the time to connect in with your heart and breathe through any stress and tension there to get back to a state of peace and oneness with your core self.

If you still have reistance to connecting with your heart, just send love to those parts of you who are scared to be seen. Breathe in gold light through your crown chakra and into each chakra, then see the gold light spreading through every cell of your body, every muscle, every fibre, all your DNA, RNA and molecules. This helps to relax, calm and soothe the body. It gives the cells what they need to start healing and releasing that which no longer serves them. Gold light is a high vibration that can help shift out that which no longer serves us and that which holds us back from living life more fully.

Embrace who you really are, your uniqueness. It truly is okay to be you. There is no need to hide it or yourself away from the world. While those in your early life may not have honoured who you are, you can and must if you want to be peaceful and happy. Own it, own who you are and have fun in your unique way.

When you let yourself have pleasure, by doing what you love, you will discover how you can do that and be of service to others. There is a way that your passion can become helpful to others and even a source of income for you, if you wish it to be so. It is up to you. You may not want to turn it into a business adventure. You may just want it to be your hobby, your special time out just for you. Whatever it is, do it, honour who you are and let your real self shine. No need to hide it under a bushel, let your love out, your light shine through and be at peace. For you truly are safe and deeply loved throughout the Universe. You just need to clear out the old story and residue, so you can see the truth and live your life without fear and with a lot more joy. So be it. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (22 May 2016).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

It didn’t start with you – inherited family trauma

Here’s a link to an article about a great new book explaining how we can inherit trauma from past generations of family members and how we can use family constellations and other methods to heal it.

The article (and the book) include case studies of clients that were not be helped with traditional psychology approaches that focused on what had happened throughout the client’s life. Once they opened to the idea that the trauma, pattern, addiction, health issue may have been inherited, solutions were found using Family Constellations concepts.

If you have an issue that doesn’t seem to shift no matter what you do, consider looking further back in your family line at where it may have come from. I can help you to do this.

it didn't start with you book

How to free yourself from fear?

Fear takes hold of us when we are put into a state of phsyical danger. It is a natural mechanism designed to help us. It is the fight or flight or freeze response associated with the amygdala in the brain.

When a wild animal or cave man is attacking you, it is a good response. Blood flows away from your organs, digestion, immune system and brain and goes to your muscles, so that you have the best chance of winning the fight or out running your attacker. In this response you are helped to survive.

However, for many people their body’s are locked in fight or flight mode all the time. This is not helpful or healthy. It makes the body stressed and unable to do all that it needs to do with ease and grace.

We need to help calm and soothe our bodies back to a state of peace and relaxation. We need to let go of the tension that accumulates so readily in modern life. Rushing around all the time, trying to meet deadlines, putting ourselves under unnecessary pressure to achieve, to succeed in our jobs, our homes, our families, to have the best of everything.

Modern society measures success based on wealth and posessions. This is not an accurate description of success, for it ignores the lack of joy, close relationships, poor health, fatigue and exhaustion that comes from always being on the go.

Health-Happiness-Peace

A truer measure of success is peace and happiness. Is a person happy with their life, are they operating from their passion, fulfiling their creativity and purpose in life, are they loved, loving and kind with many close friends and healthy relationships with family, work colleagues and those they meet on the street. Do they have time to spend with their kids, who know that they are loved, important, valued and heard. Or are they waving goodbye to the kids in front of the TV as they go off to work.

Which version of life do you relate to most? If the first then it is not surprising that your body may be locked in a fearful state. There is no deep relaxation when someone is constantly on the go, rushing around. The body doesn’t get a chance to relax and recharge. Sleep may be broken and less of it than is needed for good health.

During sleep the body realigns with its natural state. With the mind switched off it can finally connect with Source and let all the residue of the day be cleared out. Some of it appears as dreams. Some of it just releases. But deep sleep is needed for this restorative process to occur.

If a person is locked in to chronic fear, they may struggle to sleep soundly, which then exacerbates the situation, as the body does not get the time to heal itself that it needs. Sleep really is very important. It is worth going to bed an hour earlier so you can sleep more. It is certainly more important than watching TV.

Most of people’s fears today are not about life and death situations. It is usually about stressful situations faced due to pushing themselves too hard in modern living – traffic, job pressures, rushing around, not having time to do everything that is needed. These are the superficial fears, the feeling like the ‘wheels will fall off’ if you actually stopped to rest. These are easily rectified by actually choosing to do less. By realising that you are living at a pace that the human body has not been designed for. So, choose to do less. Cut out unnecessary tasks and do only that which bring you joy and are truly required for you to live a happy and healthy life.

The deeper seated fears are those that come from childhood conditioning – ‘Am I good enough?’, ‘Am I lovable?’, ‘Am I acceptable as a human being?’. These are core fears, doubts about your being, your essence, that have resulted from not receiving enough of your parent’s attention, love and kindness when you were little.

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With modern lifestyles this is only getting worse, as more and more families have 2 working parents and the children spend more time in front of the TV and in childcare than they do talking or having fun with Mum and Dad.

Children’s developing brains do not have the capacity to understand that Mum and Dad are working so hard because they think they need to have the big, fancy house and cars and holiday homes, etc. The children simply see that Mum and Dad do not want to spend time with them and they assume it is because of a lack inside themselves.‘If I was more lovable, a better person, if I was more ….. then Mum and Dad would spend more time with me. They don’t value doing so, don’t make time for it, so I must not be valuable or lovable’.

This sets the scene for a fearful life with low self esteem. The child grows looking outside themselves for validation, constantly looking for evidence that their fears are real. ‘See the way that person looked at me, it confirms my fear that the world is a cruel place or danagerous place. See how that person pushed past me, etc’. These people may not have even noticed the first person and their actions aren’t deliberate or targeted, but because of the fearful thinking the person takes it to heart and draws false conclusions about the world and their safety in it.

In time with enough fearful thinking, it becomes habituated and the body goes about reacting as if it is always in danger. The day is lived on high alert, which is not healthy for the person concerned. As it takes hold the body gets overloaded and the result can be panic attacks and high anxiety levels. The body is so full of adrenalin and other fear related chemicals, that it becomes toxic and normal thinking abilities cease. The blood is flowing away from the conscious mind, locked into the primitive or hind brain in fight or flight mode. This is traumatising and exhausting.

Underneath all of this fear is faulty thinking, false assumptions about self and your ability to cope with life. Negative self messages may have been programmed into your subconscious mind when you were little, leaving you feeling weak and helpless.

From 0-7 the developing brain of a child simply absorbs what it hears, like a tape recording. What a child hears is what they believe about themselves and their abilities. It becomes the self-talk they say to themselves later on. It becomes the programming in their subconsicous mind. If a child is told it is weak, clumsy, useless, unwanted, a burden, not good enough, etc, then these become the core beliefs that the person will live with throughout their life, unless they learn how to change them.

If a child is told it is hopeless or can’t achieve, then they will struggle to be successful throughout their life. There will be this internal self sabotage due to their programming, which won’t let them be successful. Those negative self beliefs will kick in and stop them achieving their goals. Worse, it will create high levels of stress and anxiety whenever they try to achieve anything, as the tape recording in their subconscious mind will be constantly playing – telling them they are going to fail or are in danger of making a fool of themself if they try, etc.

Some people are aware of this negative self talk, for others it occurs quietly below the surface and they don’t even hear it. But it is occurring regularly throughout the day, adding to the fear and anxiety.

Over coming the fear and anxiety requires turning up the volume of the self talk so you are aware of it, then choosing to change it. Every time you hear a negative self belief, stop it, and say a more positive statement to yourself. Instead of ‘You always do that, you always stuff up’, say ‘In the past i’ve struggled, that’s true, but now i’m choosing to be kinder to myself. I can do this. I just have to practice and build my skills’. Become your own best friend and encourager of yourself.

The subconscious beliefs can be reprogrammed, changed to be positive, supportive beliefs that help you achieve your goals. There are many ways to do this including Psych-K, Lifeline Technique, Hypnosis [and] use of affirmations for long enough and often enough that the statement becomes habitual thought.

While affirmations take a long time to become habituated, the other techniques are much quicker. With Psych-K it only takes a few minutes to replace negative beliefs with more positive ones. However, lots of belief balances are needed as most people have a lifetime of negative self beliefs to reprogram. As you do, the tension in your body can release as the fearful programming is let go of. If you know you are safe, loved, wanted and cared for there is less reason for being on high alert. The body can start to relax as the danger has passed.

This deep level of core belief change is needed for this deep relaxation to occur. That is why just thinking more positively is not enough. Our conscious mind represents only 5% of our brain’s processing capacity. 90-95% of it occurs in the subconscious mind, which makes your body function without you having to think about it. The subconscious mind makes our hearts beat, our lungs breathe, our digestion work, etc. It does all of this without our having to think about it and it is so powerful it over rides our conscious thoughts. We cannot make ourselves stop breathing or not be hungry, our body forces us to breathe and to know that we need to eat. So, just using positive thinking is not enough to over come these deeper bodily reactions and programming. Changing core self beliefs is needed to help the body relax and let go of fear.

Diet and exercise also assist the body to be healthier, as does extra sleep, vitamins and minerals. There are many things that can be done to help the body let go of fear – massage can help a body in heightened fight or flight mode to relax a little and slow down.

For those that have been abused or suffered trauma, body work is very important as the person needs to learn that it can be safe to be touched. This is crucial for their body to relax and soften and allow them to feel safe again. It will take time for this relaxation to occur. Someone who has been traumatised and hasn’t released the underlying emotion may automatically flinch when touched. They automatically pull away for fear of further abuse or trauma. This is very sad, and this patterning will continue unless action is taken to heal it.

Underneath the fear and anxiety is buried emotions from the initial events that led to the conditioning. It may be sadness or anger or shame and embarassment. Whatever it is, these emotions need to be felt and released so the body can go back to its natural state of peace and relaxation.

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Know it is possible to overcome exagerated fear responses. It is possible to heal these automatic reactions. It just takes time and effort to calm and soothe your body, to reprogram your subconscious beliefs and use more self supportive thinking and self talk patterns. Time in nature can also soothe us as can body work, diet and exercise. There is much that can be done. Enjoy. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (18 November 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How to overcome the tendency to isolate?

People isolate themselves when they are feeling overwhelmed by life. They may have been hurt badly and not trust anyone or they may be fearful and depressed. Either way hiding out alone feels safer than risking contact with a world that to them seems harsh, unforgiving, cruel and threatening.

Life is not like that at all. You are always surrounded in the love of God, however, most people are so busy in their heads that they don’t notice it. You rush from one place, one task, one test to the next. You don’t rest fully in the peace of God, in your heart or spend time in nature deeply connecting to the Earth and your true nature.

People rush, rush, rush and then feel exhausted, then they wonder why they have no energy to enjoy life, to go and have fun. They get caught up in negative thoughts and conditioning, which just play out on an endless loop, until they wake up from this state of exhaustion and seek the light.

Sadly all this busy-ness has led to diminished connections with other people. It is rare for you to stop and meet another fully, to look into their eyes and feel their essence, to hear what is going on in their hearts and to talk honestly, truthfully about their experience of life.

empty-cup

You are all walking around like empty cups. Your cups should be filled with love and be over flowing from you to others. Connecting to God, to nature, to each other deeply fills your cup. But most people, nearly everyone, thinks they are too busy to slow down and have their cup filled.

If conflict occurs and you feel fearful, your cup is drained of the little amount of love you have in it. Then you feel empty, drained, exhausted. You know that it was the conflict with that person who led to you feeling drained, so you vow to isolate yourself from people like that, so you don’t get drained further. But in isolating yourself out of fear your cup stays empty. You get stuck in fear and that is the opposite vibration of love.

To love fully you need to be filling your own cup from God/Source/Nature, then you have so much love it doesn’t matter if a little conflict occurs. You will be able to respond to it more lovingly and be less affected by it as your cup is full and over flowing. Instead of getting upset, angry or blaming the person for negatively affecting you, you would simply send them love, feel compassion for them, as they are obviously having a hard time and have an empty cup.

So the key to feeling good is not to isolate out of fear, but to connect with love to God/Source/Nature, to listen to your heart and do things that bring you joy. Do this and your cup is filled, then it is easier to face the other aspects of life.

With people that you do feel safe and good around, make sure you take the time to connect, to talk heart to heart, to fel seen, heard, validated. You will never have that kind of connection with everyone, but when your cup is full the interactions that are less pleasant don’t bother you so much.

Yes you should have boundaries between yourself and those who disrespect you, abuse you or take advantage of you. That is self love, to say no to their demands. But make sure you spend time with those who do love you, respect you and treat you well. Don’t isolate and hide – at home, in social media, in work, etc. Come out into the open and breathe in fresh air, absorb the love, take the risk to open your heart and be present to what life is bringing you. It is all helping you grow and all leading you forward to a higher vibration, to the vibration of love. It is a process, a long one for many who resist out of fear, but know you will get there in the end, everyone will. You just have to open your heart, love yourself and others and just BE.

Be present to all that occurs, choosing faith and peace, knowing it is all perfect and all of life is made of God and is doing God’s will. There are no bad people or places or choices, just learning opportunities. Just people who have closed their hearts to love and the light and who will open back up in time. Nothing to do or force, just trust God’s plan and love all that arises. Send love to your fear, to your pain and to your sadness. Send love to those who you perceive have harmed you. That is what they need most – love. Noone who is feeling good about themself and is at peace within would willingly hurt another. They know that to do so hurts themself. So know that anyone who does hurt you is suffering, they are struggling within themself and with life.

You don’t need to accept the poor treatment, but try to send them love instead of hate or anger or judgement. They are judging themselves harshly and that is what leads to their angst. It can be torture when you are stuck in self defeating patterns of self judgement, self hate and self loathing.

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Sadly many people speak to themselves more harshly than they would speak to others. They beat themselves up internally calling themselves names and feeling not good enough. It can be a very dark place. Know that noone will treat you as badly as you treat yourself!

When you are in that dark place the whole world seems dark, but the light is there, just waiting for you to see it and let it in. This is the process of awakening to love, light, God, peace and joy. This is the path back to wholeness. Become your own best friend, be loving and kind to yourself, say nice things about yourself to yourself. Be the loving parent you wished you had. As you become more loving to you internally, the outside world will mirror it, bringing you people who treat you with more kindness and love. Life is just a mirror showing us what we still have to heal.

Heal it and see the truth, there is nothing but love around us. Anything else is an illusion created by our minds out of fear, judgement and hate. Heal it and you wil see peace, joy and beauty wherever you go. for it is there, we just have to clear out the blocks, the filters to seeing it. Blessed BE. Amen.

Remember everyone is on this journey, you are all isolating out of fear to some degree, not showing your true self for fear of rejection or ridicule. Yet you all are longing for love and acceptance, so why not give it. Just love everyone as they are. If you could do this the pain and fear will drop away and you will all feel safer, happier and more able to enjoy life fully. Choose to love and be loving, that is the key. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (5 November 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

Why is it useful to spend time in nature?

nature-scenes-04Nature vibrates at the rate of Source energy. It helps us slow down and our vibration rise. It is calming and soothing to our nervous systems that are over stimulated from modern living and rushing around.

Nature shows us life’s pace – things grow, bloom, wither and die. There is no fanfare or drama linked to these events, it is simply part of life. There are times when life seems bountiful – good weather, nutrients, enough water and plants thrive. There are times when life seems poor, harsh and cruel – no water, drought, blistering heat. Yet the plants and animals simply adjust, changing their behaviour to suit the circumstances. Some may perish. This is not a personal vendetta or attack. It is simply life in the bigger picture.

All species need some form of control to limit numbers and destruction of the ecosystem from over population. Different species eat each other. Pests and disease come to wipe out some populations. It is all part of the cycle of life.

Trees don’t take it personally when the wind blows, pushing them around. They just bend as much as they can and let the wind blow. They don’t go into ‘Why me, it’s so unfair, i’m a good tree, I haven’t hurt anyone, etc’. They just bend and adjust. They just keep growing. And life can be much simpler and more enjoyable for us if we learn to do the same.

It is our emotional reactions to events in our life that create the suffering. If we just flow with life, accepting what occurs and adjusting to it as need be, we wouldn’t suffer as much.

The loss of that job or partner is not a tragedy, it is a step in your evolutionary process, it is leading you forward to something far greater.

When we are comfortable in our lives, we just sit and be still through much of it. This is beneficial, a time of rest, restrengthening. The bud is beginning to reach out, absorb the sun and is readying itself to burst forth in bloom when the time is right.

Most of us will not step out of our nice, comfy place without a push, a life event catapaulting us forward to face whatever needs to be faced for our growth and evolution. We need the storms in order to grow. The floods and fires shake things up so that new life can spring forth once the tidal wave of change recedes.

Big events in our lives, unexpected massive changes to our lives are like these storms. They unhook us from our stable foundations and force us to adapt, to find a way to evolve and grow.

Human beings are part of nature and are also exposed to similar cycles and patterns of growth. Nature itself shows us the most useful way to respond. Nature adapts and moves on. The deer run when the lion is around and rest when it is not. The bear hibernates in winter. He doesn’t push through, trying to force things to be different than they are. He just does the wisest thing he can to conserve his energy and stay strong. He rests, sleeps deeply and awakens when the time is right and the harvest is present. We do the same.

Spending time in nature helps us in so many ways. The green colour which is so prevalent in natural scenes soothes our heart and helps the heart chakra open. The blue of water soothes our throat making it easier for us to calmly speak our truth. The beauty of nature leaves us in awe of life and to creation, helping us consider that there may be a creator who produced all of this magnificence.

Nature soothes us, replenishes us and helps us ground within our bodies, to come out of the head or mind chatter and be present in the moment. Walking bare foot on grass helps us heal. It allows the energy of the Earth to travel up our legs and calm the body. It is a good cure for jet lag too, helping us adjust to the new location / new energy that you are in.

Nature truly is our friend, of great benefit to us and when we destroy it, we are harming ourselves literally. Without nature in abundance the air we breathe would not get cleansed or purified, the water cycle would not work as well and pollution would stagnate in our water instead of being filtered out. The soil would erode without tree roots holding it in place and the land would become barren, making it more difficult to grow our food.

When we disturb the balance of nature we suffer as well. So plant some trees, support your local environmental groups and give thanks to this wonderful planet who supports us, nourishes us and heals us, all without asking for recognition, compensation or reward. Thank you Mother Nature. Thank you. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (04 November 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How to stop being over controlling?

People are over controlling when they feel scared and vulnerable underneath. They micro-manage everything in an attempt to stay safe and have everything work out as they want it to. If another person does not behave the way they want, the first person is likely to get very angry as they fear the consequences of that person’s actions will be devastating.

Underneath it all is FEAR, lots of fear, hurt and sadness which has built up over the person’s lifetime. The controlling personality is just a defense mechanism to cover up the fear and protect their vulnerability.

In reality the process of over controlling is exhausting, it is done frantically, manically. It is not a peaceful process and it certainly isn’t kind. A controlling person can be very bossy and judgmental as they push through trying to force the outcome they need to feel safe.

They are not thinking about the other person’s feelings or needs, only their own. While this sounds selfish, it is not really. It is not coming from a place of my needs are more important than yours. It is coming from a space of ‘I need you to do this in order for me to feel safe, I am in danger unless you do this, you must do this, please do this’. It is a painful way to live, so desperate and afraid.

Many controlling people appear tough, cold, judgmental, unemotional, but that is just the mask they wear to cover up their vulnerability and fear. What the person really needs is to drop the mask, feel the feelings, release the hurt and sadness, learn to speak their truth in kind and loving ways. For instance:

‘I know I have been pushy and controlling wanting you to do certain things. I’m sorry that I have been so forceful. I was afraid that if you didn’t do those things, X would happen and that worries me. I’m scared Y will occur and I wanted to avoid that. I understand you don’t feel the same ways as me and you may have felt I was saying “You are not good enough as your are”. Please know that I never meant for you to feel that. You are a beautiful child of God on your own path of healing and wholeness. I was just scared and wanted to avoid what I feared would occur. What I really need is to say all of this to you and stop pretending to be strong. Can we work out a plan together to tackle this situation, then I can relax knowing that it will be okay.

When I start to get scared or frustrated can you please just give me a hug, help me to feel okay, safe, reassured that all is okay. I would love it if we could do that. I know it is not your job to look after me, I will look after me, I am just sharing how I feel. I will do my best to let go and trust you to do what is agreed to. I may slip up and be pushy occasionally – this has been a lifetime habit. If I do slip up just let me know and give me a hug. Please don’t get mad at me. I mean no harm, I’m just scared and need to be comforted and reassured. Thank you for loving me, listening to me, and caring for me. I love you and value you and want to treat you better and I will do so. Thank you’

If a person who has been over controlling like this can speak their truth, the armour can start to melt, they can let go of the rigidity, soften the emotions and feel their heart beat. They will need to learn self supportive talking techniques to reassure themselves whenever they start feeling vulnerable. They will need to learn positive thinking / thought stopping skills, so they can stop a negative thought in its tracks and change it to a more positive one. ‘Yes, I used to believe it would be a disaster if …. occurred. I know now that I would cope, even if it did occur. In all the years of worrying about …… it has never or rarely happened and even when it has, it hasn’t been that bad. I’ve coped. I’ve survived. I’ve learned and I’m okay!’

Free-Bird

Worry is pointless, it really is, let it go. Let go of wasting your days in fear. Let it go. Focus on your breathing and calm your body this way. Deepen your breathing as much as you can. Long breaths into the belly help your body to calm and to regulate itself. Fear chemicals will get dissolved and you can return to a state of balance and peace.

Know that those people who appear most rigid, have the most emotion locked inside them. They have not processed and released it. They have bottled it up inside and they are like a pressure cooker waiting to explode. They are under great internal pressure that they need to learn to regulate, to let the steam out little by little, in manageable ways until the pressure has dissipated.

Processing the emotions underneath controlling behaviour will take time and courage to face the truth of your feelings and drop your personality mask. It requires a willingness to be vulnerable, to meet and reveal your true self, your inner child and all the hurts that have been hidden. Doing so leads to freedom, to inner peace, better relationships and more enjoyment of life. It is worth doing. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (29 October 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

Jodi-Anne’s career – a brief overview

Jodi-Anne started her career as a local government Environmental Health Officer. She soon became interested in how to obtain behaviour change for sustainability and specialised in this area. She conducted the research for her PhD on this topic with a focus on business sustainability. Since then she has branched into activities for creating more sustainable and adaptable communities where people work in partnership for the good of all.

Jodi-Anne studied to become a Counsellor majoring in healing from Child Abuse, as she wanted to help heal herself and those around her who had suffered painful beginnings to life. She saw how deeply this affected people and limited their ability to love and accept themselves, to connect with others and with the Earth. She saw how the emotional pain people held inside led to dysfunction and disease, in particular to consumption and addiction. These coping mechanisms are ultimately unhelpful – burdening the individual, society and the environment. We need to heal ourselves so that we can be peaceful and harmonious in our interactions with our self, others and the Planet.

Jodi-Anne has a Bachelor of Applied Science (Environmental Health), a Post Graduate Diploma in Natural Resource Management, a PhD in obtaining behaviour change for sustainability, a Diploma in Professional Counselling (Abuse) and a Certificate IV in Workplace Training and Assessment. She has designed and facilitated leadership development programs for business and government organisations in conjunction with Global Achievers Company. She has also taught sustainability related topics at the University level and the Vocational Education and Training Sector level (TAFE). She enjoys teaching and continues to do so teaching a range of personal development workshops at the WEA (a local community college in South Australia).

Jodi-Anne loves to learn and is grateful for all she has experienced in her life. She now sees the painful childhood as a gift that has helped her evolve, learn self-love, forgiveness and true peace. She knows that if she had not been sexually abused and left alone so much by her parents who were out drinking, she would not have gained her immense desire for growth and healing. She would not have focused so much on learning and study. It was her pain that propelled her forward, fuelled her determination to have a successful career and feel some sense of security and control. Of course that would later be shattered as she realised the perfection of it all and surrendered to the guidance of the Universe, showing her how she could best serve the Planet based on her experiences.

Here is a link to view Jodi-Anne’s sustainability publications.

Jodi-Anne happily living in peace!

Happiness is an inside job!
Happiness is an inside job!

Jodi-Anne started her life full of pain, disappointment and shame. She felt unloved and unwanted by her parents and worked hard to succeed and prove she was worth loving. She hoped to get noticed and loved, but found that she rejected any kindness for lack of trusting it was real. She was wounded and armoured living from the mind and closing her heart so as not to feel the pain within or experience any more loss and disappointment.

She achieved many impressive promotions in her career and multiple qualifications only to realise that these did not make her happy or healthy. She realised in time that she hated her life and fell in and out of depression for many years. She awoke to God and the greater evolutionary journey in her mid 20’s. Since then she has been focused on releasing her emotional pain and baggage to return to a state of harmony and peace. She has used many different healing modalities and is trained in those she found most beneficial – Psych-K, Reiki, Light Therapy.

In an unexpected turn of events Jodi-Anne found herself returning to the role she first commenced her career with. She had loved that role and sang through each day enjoying being of service to the community as an Environmental Health Officer. She is currently reliving this experience and happy living simply and performing a job she enjoys and enjoying her life outside of work.

For the first time ever she has no desire to achieve, advance, fix, heal or change herself or anyone else for that matter. She finally has peace inside and is content being in that feeling and opening to greater balance in her life with social activities, close heart-focused friends and a love for life.

She is not seeing clients or offering healing services at this stage. This is a time of celebrating the peace within and honouring self. Jodi-Anne will from time to time post on this website. She will not however be on here regularly so do not be surprised if she does not answer emails or queries quickly. She is finally living and loving her life.

It is her hope that all beings find this peace and become that in the world, for then we truly will have peace on Earth. Much love to all, Jodi-Anne x