Tag Archives: trusting the flow

How to relax, have fun and play?

When your early life was full of fear and tension, you brace yourself for the next fight, the next bout of anger that gets taken out on you or your family. You live frozen in fear ready to detach, fight, flee or hide. You live braced for anger and you lose your ability to relax and have fun.

This is the legacy of being raised in an abusive home filled with violence, be that physical or emotional or both. You freeze inside. Your energy is tied up with protecting yourself and those you love. It is focused on ways to escape or avoid the worst situations you fear. You scan for ways out or ways to diffuse the bomb so explosions don’t occur.

All this fear, all this tension, makes it hard to relax and have fun. That doesn’t even enter your mind. You are exhausted from being on watch, on guard duty, helping yourself and your loved ones survive.

As you grow this pattern becomes ingrained – a strong sense of responsibility, of duty, of action to protect self and others pervades all you do. You can become over serious and focused on work or your chosen cause that you fight for – whether that be protecting children, the planet, animals or some other group that you feel is being exploited and abused.

You can become so focused on your duty and responsibility that you forget to actually live your life. You feel it is so important to keep going, keep trying, keep doing ‘what is right’, what is needed.

But in doing this you are depleting your energy reserves. You are being sucked dry of all your vitality, your joy and your enthusiasm. Eventually you will give up, it will all seem too hard, and then you collapse, exhausted, burnt out and wondering why life is so hard.

Life isn’t that hard. You’ve made it hard by driving yourself relentlessly on a cause that doesn’t need your energy. You alone do not need to save the world, the children, the poor, animals, etc.

You do not need to sacrifice your life in order to help others. You are allowed to play and have fun. You have just forgotten how to. It is such a foreign concept for you. You don’t even know where to begin.

There are so many fun things you could do, but they seem like a waste of time, unimportant or too much effort. This is just your conditioning, your habit, your fear of relaxing, being vulnerable and feeling what is underneath your compulsion.

You are not going to die just because you slow down. You are not going to be crushed by the emotional pain inside or the abuser who may no longer be present in your actual life. He is just in your head, your thoughts, your self-critical or abusive voice telling you off inside. You are not at war any more. It is okay to put the guns down. It is okay to rest and enjoy life.

This is the challenge now – to relax, to enjoy life, to find the passion and joy that you had as a child and buried when pain took over.

You have to let your true, original-self back out. This part of you may have been buried so long you don’t even recognise it as part of you anymore. It may be so deeply repressed and depressed that it takes a while to find it, to get to know it, to believe it is okay to have fun.

This is the inner work and healing you need to do in order to enjoy your life. You have to work with these inner parts and defense mechanisms to dismantle the armour, so you can relax and be free to enjoy your life.

Just being aware of it, of facing the truth of what is occurring in your life helps. It helps loosen the ropes, so you can go within to untangle yourself and free yourself from the inner prisons you have been trapped inside. This all takes time. And it takes a willingness to surrender your roles and responsibilities. A willingness to let go of focusing on helping others, the planet, animals, etc and honouring yourself – making yourself the priority, believing it is okay to do it, that you deserve it and that it is safe to look underneath the facade of your life to the deeper processes at play.

You don’t need to spend years analysing yourself or locked away doing healing processes. This is another distraction, another trap that can become all consuming, tiring and even exhausting if you do too much.

Your body needs time to integrate the shifts and changes. It will tell you when something is needed – be that healing work, rest, changes to diet, etc. If you listen your body will tell you what is needed. It will help you move forward.

When your body trusts you to listen, it will let baggage surface at a rate it can handle, for you to heal the issue and make the necessary changes to your beliefs, habits and thinking patterns. It will guide you to what you need at the rate you can handle it.

You don’t have to search for issues to heal. You don’t need to avoid life by focusing on healing or on rescuing others. You don’t need to avoid yourself and your life out of fear or emotional pain.

Sit with yourself. Sit with what arises. Feel into it. Breathe through it and let it shift. You don’t have to run away from it any more. Let yourself be. Let your self be still and absorb the healing energy of nature, of love, of friendships, of fun activities and playfulness.

Let the seriousness go and let life lead you forth. In time you will learn how to play again. It will just happen spontaneously as you slow down, relax and trust life to lead you forth with ease and grace to your destined future. You can’t get it wrong. You don’t need to figure it out, solve it or make it happen. You just need to relax, unwind and listen within.

Let it happen naturally and peacefully. It doesn’t have to be war like any more. Let the war go and know that you’re perfectly okay. It’s just habits to let go of.

If you have a very strong, determined mind, you have to detach from it and focus on your heart, your body, and listen to what they need. They can lead you forth. Send love to your mind and ignore its suggestions, it’s have to’s and must do’s. Let go of its priorities and to do lists and just BE.

Listen into your heart, your inner child and let them speak softly to you about what they would like from you.  Re-establishing these connections, the ability to be peaceful and at rest in your body. These are what lead to inner joy and freedom to be playful. It is an inner stance; an inner way of being that is then easily translated into living life with love, joy, fun and vitality.

While you are still standing there frowning with seriousness or angry that it seems so hard or furious because it should be easy. Any of these just block your peace. Of course it looks silly to play or relax when you are wound so tight you are about to explode.

Find a way to soften. Find what works for you: being in nature, gardening, being with kids, pets, or friends, doing art or music or exercise. Find whatever way in works to get you to let go of control and surrender into softness. Bodywork, massage, etc can help, as can a relaxing bath, a piece of chocolate cake or lemon tart – anything that brings joy more to the surface, so the serious you steps aside, retreats back into the background, allowing you the chance to experience another aspect of life.

You can do it. It is happening already, just you judge it because you would like it all fixed now, thank you very much! This is a process. It takes time. It takes patience and kindness. Frustration, impatience and judgement just slow it down. Be kind to yourself and others as they unravel their armour, their conditioning and their way of seeing life.

It is a complete personality shift to let go of being so serious, fighting for a cause, and sacrificing who you are and your life for a valid reason. To see that it is all a choice, to see that it has been used as a way to escape or avoid being vulnerable and taking risks. It is hard to look at all of this, for your very foundations are being shaken.

God does not require you to self-sacrifice to fight any battle. God just wants you to evolve into a God-like being of love, kindness and peace, sharing these energies wherever you go. How you choose to live your life doesn’t matter. When you have this inner peace and love inside it touches everyone you interact with. Your light shines out positively affecting all. You don’t have to effort it, force it. It just happens.

You don’t have to make yourself the best you can be. STOP. Stop this. Just relax and be you. All of us are good people. All of us are innocent, kind and loving underneath our wounds. We just have to drop below the surface and reconnect to our innate qualities, our true self. For that is already a beautiful child of God. We don’t have to improve that. We can’t. It already is perfect as it is.

Each of us truly is okay, truly is enough. We are just learning to accept that, to believe that and to love our self and others in a way that we all can relax and just BE, knowing we are okay and we can choose to enjoy life, have fun and play. No seriousness needed. Trust life to lead you forth, to guide you to your passion and your joy.

No need to try to figure it out. Just relax and BE. That is all that is needed. Drop the judgement, the trying, the forcing and just allow. Allow life to happen – in all its glory and majesty, and in all its boredom and stagnation. These are just phases you move through, like the ocean waves. There are highs and lows. There can be intensity and calmness, even flatness. These are all just phases. None are better than the other. When the time is right the winds of change will blow and move you into the next phase of your life.

So relax, let go and BE. It doesn’t have to be so challenging. Put your feet up. Read a book. Watch a movie. Go for a walk. Cook some food. Enjoy life in its simplicity and its day to day tasks. All can be enjoyed if you see it this way. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (17 March 2019).

  • Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.
  • If you found this blog useful you may wish to consider purchasing a copy of Jodi-Anne’s book ‘Advice from a higher Source’ which contains 85 more answers to questions about life. The paperback book or ebook can be purchased online at – http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JMS2011. (Once you have clicked into view the description of the book, go to the top of the page and choose the flag symbol for your country, this will show you the price in your currency and enable you to purchase it in that currency)
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How do you go with the flow?

Going with the flow refers to letting life lead you forth. You let go of expectations, goals, focused achieving and you surrender to life and follow its cues and directions for you. It is letting your heart lead instead of your mind.

Some people baulk at this concept. They fear it means sitting around, wasting time, doing nothing. This can’t be further from the truth. When you surrender to life you will be guided forth to do what is needed for your highest good. This may mean facing past hurts and healing them so that you can become more whole and integrated, then the Universe will lead you forth to be of service in some way that benefits the whole.

There is no point in you trying to force and effort it before you are ready. It simply won’t work and you will exhaust yourself in the process. The emotional density and residue inside you will fight against what you are trying to achieve.

It would be like having your foot on the gas and the brake at the same time. You may make a lot of noise and smoke, but you won’t go far. When there is still residue inside it blocks you from achieving what you think you want from your mind. Your heart, your body knows whether or not your goal is good for you and if it’s not it won’t let you achieve it.

If your body is still full of fear or negative beliefs saying “You have to hide to stay safe. Stay small so no one sees you or hurts you” then of course you will self sabotage if you at the mind level try to go out and be seen and achieve some big goal.

The ego doesn’t like to go slow, but the truth is it will be much more effective to flow with life, to heal and integrate, and then step forth into the light for all to see.

Too many people push themselves way too hard. Then they burn out from exhaustion or depression and disappointment with life.

School teaches us about achieving, about careers and getting stuff, achieving materialistic success. They don’t teach about the dangers of focusing on that as a successful life.

Poor health, marital breakdown, obese lonely kids addicted to screens, alcoholism and violence associated with numbness from feeling life is too hard and it’s not worth all the effort, feeling life is meaningless and getting eventually bored and lethargic no matter which shiny new toy you buy – house, car, yacht, etc.

Life focused on materialism takes you away from your heart. It is all ego driven and that isn’t fulfilling ultimately. What is fulfilling is connection – connection with self, with God, with family and friends, with community – feeling like you belong, that people care about you, and that you matter to someone.

We are happiest when we feel loved and secure. When we can relax and just be, knowing all is okay and we are looked after. This comes from a life led by the heart, from flowing with the guidance that comes inside you those intuitive urges, random thoughts or insights that urge you to go somewhere or speak to someone that you hadn’t been thinking about doing.

It comes from the outside synchronicities and guidance that confirm your path or intuitive urge. You think about needing a massage and next thing you see a sign for a massage on your walk at lunch. Or you think about having a holiday and someone starts talking to you about the country you would like to go to.

The form of confirmations can be many. Sometimes a song comes on the radio with lyrics that touches your heart, a movie scene, a book. There are so many ways the universe gives us messages, encouraging us to flow down a certain path that is most in line with our highest good.

To me it is a little like those ‘Choose your own ending’ books that I had as a child. The signs are there to go a certain way, but if you don’t listen another set of signs comes along to guide you and another, and if you still don’t listen eventually it’s a car accident or a health scare or some other large event that makes you stop and think about how you are living your life. It happens to get you to reflect and choose differently. It is not random, it all has purpose.

Life orchestrates it all, so we get the input we need to help us along our destined path. When you relax and follow the signs life is a lot easier. You don’t need to use so much energy or fight to be seen or heard. You relax and trust that whoever is meant to see you or hear you will and that’s enough. You don’t have to achieve huge amounts or be a super star. You are enough just being you and doing what you love, living your life with kindness.

If you are intuitively guided to a large action packed life, so be it. But if you are intuitively guided to a simple and quiet life, that’s okay too. You may be in a phase of healing and integration. There may be a more outgoing phase later, but don’t covet it or thirst after it. Trust that what comes is what is needed for your highest growth and embodiment of the light this lifetime.

So going with the flow is not a passive nothingness, it is an active attention to the inner and outer signals guiding you forth as to what to do and when to do it. It is an active listening within and without for the guidance that may come from many different sources and in many different ways.

As you do this your intuition strengthens and you will get clearer and clearer signals. Sometimes, often, you will be asked to do something that is outside your comfort zone, that stretches you – you can resist out of fear or take the leap of faith trusting that you will be supported as you take the plunge into the depths of yourself and your purpose here on Earth.

You will experience exactly what you need for your evolution and growth. Life is leading us all forth, to achieve what matters most – insight and growth, connection with our heart, love, God and Mother Earth. We are all growing and evolving, and it is all happening as it needs to. Trust in that and flow with life. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (6 August 2018).

  • Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.
  • If you found this blog useful you may wish to consider purchasing a copy of Jodi-Anne’s book ‘Advice from a higher Source’ which contains 85 more answers to questions about life. The paperback book or ebook can be purchased online at – http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JMS2011. (Once you have clicked into view the description of the book, go to the top of the page and choose the flag symbol for your country, this will show you the price in your currency and enable you to purchase it in that currency)

What does it mean to celebrate life? How do we celebrate life?

To celebrate life means to bask in the beauty of nature, to be in awe of life and its mysteries. To see the growth and goodness everywhere, to celebrate diversity and the evolution of consciousness occurring.

See the acts of goodness, kindness and growth that is occurring throughout society, see the love that is spreading, expanding, evolving. Let go of that which you judge as bad or negative, see it all as a part of the evolution and growth in society, all of it is needed. The tragedies break people’s defenses down and get them to feel, it opens their hearts back up, it serves a purpose. It isn’t bad, it is needed.

To celebrate life means to enjoy the little things, the butterflys floating by, the clouds, the rusting of the leaves on the trees. It is a celebration of what is, a being present to all that is around you and being grateful for what is and isn’t in your life. It is a knowing that you have what you need, life provides, harvests grow, short falls lead to connections and supply from others, it leads to community, to pulling together, to growth in love and connection.

Everything you need is provided, what you don’t have you don’t need at this point in your journey. There are no mistakes, all happens to help you grow, heal and evolve. Celebrate that. Let go of your judgement, your resentment, your hate and comparisons. You are all children of God, all supplied for, all taken care of. You are all here to learn your unique lessons through your unique experiences, chosen before you incarnated.

There are no accidents, no mistakes, no favouritism or luck. It is all preplanned, predetermined, and just playing out as it is needed for your evolution and growth. We are all characters in each other’s stories, our plays of life. We all serve a purpose and are here to help and support each other. Live your life, enjoy your life, be simple, do simple things, enjoy the moment.

Don’t complicate life with busyness or over thinking. Savour the stillness, appreciate what is and trust that whatever is coming is for your highest good, no matter what it looks like. Even harsh lessons lead to brighter days. So love, appreciate, give thanks and trust, that is how you celebrate life and honour all that is.

Many of you are way too serious, way too focused on material things and success, your life is passing you by, your heart is calling out to you – feel, feel me, listen to me, hear my call. Take time to listen, to sit quietly and hear the messages of your heart. It will guide you forth to greater peace, enjoyment and happiness. You don’t have to figure it out with your mind. Listen to your body, it will tell you what to do. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne M Smith (21 March 2017).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How to accept where people are at?

Amongst your community there are many people with low levels of awareness, that does not make them wrong or less than you or others who are more aware of life and the larger reasons for it. All beings are exactly where they need to be for their evolution and growth. All are awakening and becoming conscious at the rate that is best for them.

Some who appear less conscious, actually are highly evolved beings who have chosen particularly hard life paths to attempt to master a particular skill. You cannot tell someone’s level of awareness by looking at them or analysing them with your mind. You can only glimpse it through your heart, through witnessing their heart in action, their vibration, their kindness to other beings.

Those who are lofty in knowledge are not necessarily living that knowledge. They may know what it means to be aware, conscious, God-like beings. This does not mean they do it, be it, breathe it – have embodied it. They will in time. Often gaining a lot of knowledge occurs because there is deep pain to be released and they are avoiding feeling and releasing it, by staying stuck in their heads, not in their bodies where the pain is located.

In time when they are ready they will drop down into the pain, feel it, release it and balance back up. Everyone does this when they finally feel safe enough, loved enough and trusting enough that they will cope and come out the other side.

It takes time to build emotional awareness and ability to feel what is truly going on inside, to drop down and listen, to feel into that inner silence and allow forth that which needs your presence and allowance to surface, to enable your freedom once it is released.

To do it sooner than you are truly ready for just results in fear, results in retraumatisation and disillusion. To push too far before you have the ability to process it safely harms the body, as you reattach to the emotion and the story, instead of just witnessing it and letting it go.

People need to learn these skills first, learn how to sit in the pain and not own it, just let it float by. They need to learn to trust life to hold them, care for them and provide for them. This only gets learned through experience of synchronicities and life’s majestic gifts, when things happen unexplainably showing you there is a bigger plan unfolding and you are just one small part of that.

positive-parenting-nurturePeople cannot be told about this and embody it, they have to experience it and it takes time. This is why you can plant seeds of awareness, but can’t make them blossom. Life will do that and it takes each plant a different amount of time, water, love and growth to do it.

So as an educator or helper the best thing you can do is share your story, your experiences of the mysteries of life to give another hope, inspiration and a little more faith and trust. Then let go, let life lead them forth and provide them with their own miracles, to open their hearts and let them heal. You cannot make it happen. You cannot rescue or fix anyone. God will do it perfectly at the right time for that person. So do not lose sleep worrying about others or trying to figure out how to help them realise the truth or release their pain. Life will do it, life will guide them forth.

The best you can do is vibrate in as close a state of love and acceptance as you can, then your energy will help uplift theirs and hold the space for their awakening to life and its larger mysteries. Just love and accept them and know they will be led forth to their magnificence when the time is right. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (27 September 2016).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

Celebrating life – how to do it?

To celebrate life is to honour and accept all that is. It is to say thank you for all that has been, is and will be. It is saying thank you for all of it. I accept it. I honour it. I allow it to be my truth. I stop fighting against what is. I stop resenting what was. And I stop trying to force what is to come to be what I want. I accept God has a plan for my life and what I need most will come. Life will bring me what I need, so I heal, so I grow, so I evolve into a loving being of high vibration and can be of greatest service while I am here on Earth.

celebrate-17Celebrating life is acknowledging life knows best. It all happens without my effort, my struggle. I can just relax and enjoy the ride whatever comes, knowing it is needed and meant to occur. The pleasant and unpleasant events, they all come for a reason and I ride through them without judgement, without attachment, without misery – my thoughts are calm and accepting of what is – so I don’t feel misery or create drama. Instead I celebrate life. I celebrate the diversity of experiences, the learning, the greater self awareness and connection to spirit. I feel the vibration in and around me. I sense the love and beauty in all things. I see God’s touch whereever I go and I know I am guided forth to create my best life, to experience all that I can to evolve and grow while here on Earth.

I celebrate life and sing, not because I got my way or things worked out how I wanted, because they have not. I sing because I am free. Free of the tyranny of judgement and fear, free from the misery and drama of questioning and controlling. Free from the pain of feeling stuck, lost, fearful. I celebrate and sing because I am resting in the arms of the divine, knowing I am held and supported, knowing I walk the Earth with an army of supportive Angels and Guides walking by my side, urging me on into the unknown, into the depths of my heart and soul, into greatness, into wholeness, into unity with Self, God, life, with all there is, recognising, feeling and embodying oneness. I celebrate the lack of separation, isolation, loneliness. I celebrate the oneness that is our true nature and the acceptance of self and life that has finally occurred.

I enjoy each day, waiting to see what will occur, what growth will result, what greater freedom will occur due to healing whatever is triggered this day by the people, things, places, times and events I experience. I trust it is all leading me forth to achieve my highest potential, to embody my higher self on Earth. Such a gift, such an opportunity. For these gifts I am grateful and I celebrate life. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (17 Dec 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

What is impatience?

Impatience is not accepting God’s plan for your life and assuming that you know better what should occur in it.

Impatience is arrogance, wondering why you don’t have all that you want and getting angry or frustrated as you feel you have missed out. But you haven’t missed out on anything. You have experienced exactly what you needed to experience in this life time, for the greatest evolution of your soul. Trust in this. If you do trust God / the Universe to bring you exactly what you need then you can relax and flow. You can be peaceful and content. You can be happy right now in whatever circumstances you are in.

Impatience is an unwillingness to accept what is or to accept divine timing. What you want may or may not eventuate, it depends on what will lead to the most growth for you as a soul. Sometimes painful experiences are needed to help us separate from our ego mind and being totally focussed on ego goals e.g. career, success, wealth, advancement.

God works in humble ways and through humble means. There is no fanfare when flowers blossom, even though it is a miraculous achievement, one worthy of singing and exalting. Likewise when a limb falls off of a tree there is no mourning, no solemn exchange or grief. Nature just flows and accepts what is.

tree and flowerNature shows us the transitions in life, the process of birth, growth, decay, rotting and death. It shows us what we all must go through. What we all must learn from. We cannot avoid these stages completely. We can certainly go through them with ease and grace, but it is hard for most to accept the loss of their vitality or ability to do all that they used to be able to do. Many people fight death and old age, try to deny it, resist it, but that doesn’t work. Accept it as part of life, love yourself through all stages of life, all shapes of your body, trim and athletic or round and pudgy. It doesn’t matter which.

What matters is love. Are you able to love yourself and others at all times? Can you remain kind and patient when people need your help? Are you still loving when you don’t get your own way? Are you still happy and peaceful in amidst chaos, trusting it will shift and accepting it as God’s will? These are the signs of spiritual mastery. These show you your progress. The other material stuff does not matter. God does not care if you own 3 houses and a sports car. He cares if you can give your time and attention to the poor and destitute making them feel loved and accepted, and worthy of life. God cares how loving we are to ourselves, others and the Earth. God is love and wishes us to become that too.

There is no rush in mastering this. Life is our learning ground and we evolve at a rate we can handle. We will get there this lifetime or another. There is no rush, so relax, enjoy what comes, knowing it is helping you evolve. That is all you need to do.

Follow your heart’s guidance. If it is telling you to leave your job or relationship then do it. We fight so hard against the heart’s messages out of fear. What if it isn’t the right thing to do? What if i’m mistaken or naive? Most of society doesn’t listen to their heart. They are conditioned not to, so it does feel risky to listen to it, to follow its urges, especially when that requires letting go of security and control, which in reality are illusions, but strong ones the ego mind holds on to.

Will I be safe if I follow my heart? Most certainly yes. God and the angels will be by your side, singing and celebrating as you move into your true profession, being of service in whatever way makes your heart sing and your eyes water with gratitude. Noone is holding you back from this except yourself. Trust the process. Trust in life and have faith that all is working out as it needs to for your highest good and the highest good of all.

We are all evolving into loving, light filled beings. This is what life on Earth is about. It’s not about achieving material wealth or success at ego tasks. Those are distractions from the true task. The task to love more fully every day and stay connected both to God and your heart as you move through each day. So let go of impatience; and trust, accept what is and listen to your heart. It will guide you home to peace and happiness. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (01 Dec 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.