Author: Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith

Jodi-Anne is a Wellbeing Educator, Counsellor and Healing Facilitator. She shares information via her videos, website, workshops, books, and coming soon online courses. She conducts individual appointments in person and online assisting individuals to heal and find peace. She is a qualified counsellor specialising in healing from trauma and abuse, utilising Family Constellations, Tension & Trauma Release Exercises (TRE), Psych-K, and Crystal Light Bed Therapy. To learn more visit https://www.jodiannemsmith.com/

How to anchor within your body?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Conscious Evolution, Health, Self help techniques, Uncategorized

Many of you live inside your minds disconnected from your bodies. You eat, you sleep, you do all that you do without much feeling or awareness of what is truly going on inside you. Your body may be screaming at you saying “I need rest” or “I need exercise”, but you don’t hear it. You are too busy rushing from one task to another or numbing out so you don’t feel your unhappiness with your life.

Some people numb out with food, others alcohol, work, computer games, Facebook, etc – anything that helps you escape and not have to look too deeply at what is going on inside, behind the curtain so to speak.

Your body has great wisdom to share with you, but most people have learned to ignore it. They don’t want to acknowledge they are unhappy with their work or their relationship. They don’t want to face the consequences of that truth as it is scary to contemplate changing jobs, leaving a marriage or following your passion in a different direction.

The loss of security, certainty, safety feels too threatening, so we eat or drink or do whatever action we need to distract our self from that niggling sensation inside and the truth of our being. If we disconnect completely we die, so most of us maintain a minimal connection. We can feel a little, but avoid feeling a lot.

Some have dissociated from their bodies due to trauma. It is like they float above and outside of the body, connected by a thread, just watching, waiting for the next traumatic experience. Such a person lives in fight, flight, freeze, flop. They are rarely relaxed or enjoying life. Their life force energy is used up by the hypervigilant nervous system constantly scanning for danger. Such a person is hardly connected to their body at all and can let bad things occur without feeling it.

They may eat to excess to the point of becoming obese. They may have sex with strangers and not really be present during it. They may walk into the path of oncoming traffic without realising they have done so. When you’re not in your body you are risking your health in more ways than one.

Eventually the body will get sick. How sick depends on your fate and your determination not to listen to the body’s messages. If you constantly ignore your intuition or your truth that you are unhappy in some way, then your body has to ramp up the message so you will listen.

It tries many ways, but if you refuse to hear then illness, accidents, near death experiences may occur to get you to stop and pay attention. Much better to face the truth before then, to listen to your body, to ground within it and become at peace with yourself and your life.

Many people feel helpless to change their circumstances, hence they avoid it. Start by just acknowledging what is – “I don’t like where I’m living or what I’m doing. I’m lonely and scared. I hate myself and what I’ve become ……” It may not be that severe, it may only be “I wish I hadn’t done X,Y,Z. If I hadn’t I would be in a better position now. If only I had…..”. Any of these types of regrets, resentments, self loathing will lower your energy and if the pain is too great you will numb out in some way.

It is like our bodies are full of ice. All that unmoving emotion frozen within. To start thawing it out we need to acknowledge it exists. “Yes, this is how I’m feeling. I don’t know what to do about it yet, but this is how I’m feeling”. To even just admit that helps so much. It may let you breathe a bit deeper, to see within a little more.

Then you can consider options. “I’m not ready to make a massive change in my life yet. I know I could, but I’m going to be kind to myself and take it slow. I’m going to support myself as I learn how to respond to this and as I listen for insight and guidance as to the next best steps for me to take”. Become your own best friend.

Slow down and give yourself a chance to rest, to integrate and strengthen. Spend time in nature and let it soothe you, replenish you, guide you. Pray and ask for guidance and support from God or your Higher Self, your Guides of Angels. Who or whatever you are comfortable connecting with. For some people that may be Mother Earth or a deceased loved one who they love and trust.

Your ancestors are around you in spirit form. They do connect with you and you can gain strength and support from them. Just welcome them into your heart. Ask them to hold you and guide you. There is so much support available to us from life. We just have to ask and allow it in. Simply close your eyes and ask your ancestors to be with you. Sense them nearby, talk to them, let yourself see them, feel them, hear them. You can and it is good for you. Anything that helps your heart open and your mouth smile is beneficial.

Trust in life and your process. It is okay to go slow. Nature shows us the passing seasons and cycles. It takes time to grow. There’s a time for stagnation, for the shoot to emerge, for the plant to grow and strengthen, for the flower to bud, blossom, wilt and die. There is a time for the seed to fall, to hibernate, to germinate and for the cycle to repeat itself with new growth and life.

We humans want it all to happen now. We expect life to be all okay, all happy right now thank you very much. That’s not how life works. We have spent a lifetime, if not more, partially disconnected from our bodies. It is going to take time to reinhabit them, to melt the ice, to feel the feelings, to honour our truth and find the courage to act upon it. See what is involved. See that all you need to do is take baby steps and let the process occur.

Your body wants to be healthy and happy. Your soul wants you to grow and evolve. It will give you the insights and guidance you need. You just have to be willing to face your truth and take baby steps towards your goal.

You don’t need to figure it out with your mind. Let your mind rest. Let life force flow to the rest of your body. Your mind doesn’t have to work so hard. It’s actually not in charge. It thinks it is. The ego wants it to be. But your body is much, much more powerful and it will win out.

No matter how much you study, learn, succeed or achieve, your body will make you stop and listen. That’s why so many over achievers have heart attacks or other physical challenges. They love their mind, but ignore their body. Until one day the body says “Enough, pay attention to me”. It is a little like a child’s tantrum, but it is an important one, a life threatening or empowering one, depending on which way you look at it.

Many people think of their body as failing them, as the enemy, as an annoying nuisance interrupting their plans. This is foolish. You are your body, it is you. You need to accept this and honour all of you. It’s not selfish to take good care of you. You need to do it. Then you can make a more whole-hearted contribution to society. You can take heart-felt sustainable action that fulfils you, strengthens you and brings you joy. You do this by embodying all of who you are.

It’s time to embrace your body, to anchor within, and to listen to your Soul. Listen and you will be guided forth as to what is most needed. That may be rest, stillness, play and fun. For many that seems pointless, a waste of time. It’s not. Your body needs time to replenish, to strengthen and heal.

Often the answer to a problem will intuitively come once you’ve stopped focusing on it and struggling to find it with your mind. Let go of control and feel, play, have fun. It is just as important for your health if not more so than the food you eat.

You can eat the healthiest food, but if you are disconnected from your body, it doesn’t benefit from the nourishment you have given it. Even vitamin tablets may not be absorbed fully if your focus is in your mind or outside of yourself. You can literally be starving yourself by your thinking and actions that are negative for the body.

It’s time for us to realise we have a new task, a new baby or pet or responsibility to take care of and it requires a lot of our time and attention. When we do give to it and love it, we blossom. We need to honour our bodies, our whole self – just like a baby or child in our care. It is that precious, that dependent on us, that important. We have to give to ourself that same love, care, devotion and attention. We deserve it, for each of us is a precious child, a precious Soul living life the best way it knows how.

It’s time to simplify our ambitions and to focus on living life honouring our self, our needs and opening our hearts to see where life wants us to go, not where we think it should be. Just be yourself, anchor into your body and let yourself move forth with love for self, others and the planet who supports us. When we anchor into our hearts we will be much more nourished and fulfilled. It is safe for you to do so, to be in your body and your heart. Comfort yourself like you would a scared child, for that is what you are.

Comfort yourself and see the inner ice melt and fall away. Let the light in, let the warmth of the sun fill you with more vibrant energy and sing your way through life listening to the information in the wind that blows inside and outside of you. That is how you anchor into your body and your life. Blessed Be. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (12 August 2018).

  • Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.
  • If you found this blog useful you may wish to consider purchasing a copy of Jodi-Anne’s book ‘Advice from a higher Source’ which contains 85 more answers to questions about life. The paperback book or ebook can be purchased online at – http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JMS2011. (Once you have clicked into view the description of the book, go to the top of the page and choose the flag symbol for your country, this will show you the price in your currency and enable you to purchase it in that currency)

How do you go with the flow?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Conscious Evolution, Personal Development

Going with the flow refers to letting life lead you forth. You let go of expectations, goals, focused achieving and you surrender to life and follow its cues and directions for you. It is letting your heart lead instead of your mind.

Some people baulk at this concept. They fear it means sitting around, wasting time, doing nothing. This can’t be further from the truth. When you surrender to life you will be guided forth to do what is needed for your highest good. This may mean facing past hurts and healing them so that you can become more whole and integrated, then the Universe will lead you forth to be of service in some way that benefits the whole.

There is no point in you trying to force and effort it before you are ready. It simply won’t work and you will exhaust yourself in the process. The emotional density and residue inside you will fight against what you are trying to achieve.

It would be like having your foot on the gas and the brake at the same time. You may make a lot of noise and smoke, but you won’t go far. When there is still residue inside it blocks you from achieving what you think you want from your mind. Your heart, your body knows whether or not your goal is good for you and if it’s not it won’t let you achieve it.

If your body is still full of fear or negative beliefs saying “You have to hide to stay safe. Stay small so no one sees you or hurts you” then of course you will self sabotage if you at the mind level try to go out and be seen and achieve some big goal.

The ego doesn’t like to go slow, but the truth is it will be much more effective to flow with life, to heal and integrate, and then step forth into the light for all to see.

Too many people push themselves way too hard. Then they burn out from exhaustion or depression and disappointment with life.

School teaches us about achieving, about careers and getting stuff, achieving materialistic success. They don’t teach about the dangers of focusing on that as a successful life.

Poor health, marital breakdown, obese lonely kids addicted to screens, alcoholism and violence associated with numbness from feeling life is too hard and it’s not worth all the effort, feeling life is meaningless and getting eventually bored and lethargic no matter which shiny new toy you buy – house, car, yacht, etc.

Life focused on materialism takes you away from your heart. It is all ego driven and that isn’t fulfilling ultimately. What is fulfilling is connection – connection with self, with God, with family and friends, with community – feeling like you belong, that people care about you, and that you matter to someone.

We are happiest when we feel loved and secure. When we can relax and just be, knowing all is okay and we are looked after. This comes from a life led by the heart, from flowing with the guidance that comes inside you – those intuitive urges, random thoughts or insights that urge you to go somewhere or speak to someone that you hadn’t been thinking about doing.

It comes from the outside synchronicities and guidance that confirm your path or intuitive urge. You think about needing a massage and next thing you see a sign for a massage on your walk at lunch. Or you think about having a holiday and someone starts talking to you about the country you would like to go to.

The form of confirmations can be many. Sometimes a song comes on the radio with lyrics that touches your heart, a movie scene, a book. There are so many ways the universe gives us messages, encouraging us to flow down a certain path that is most in line with our highest good.

To me it is a little like those ‘Choose your own ending’ books that I had as a child. The signs are there to go a certain way, but if you don’t listen another set of signs comes along to guide you and another, and if you still don’t listen eventually it’s a car accident or a health scare or some other large event that makes you stop and think about how you are living your life. It happens to get you to reflect and choose differently. It is not random, it all has purpose.

Life orchestrates it all, so we get the input we need to help us along our destined path. When you relax and follow the signs life is a lot easier. You don’t need to use so much energy or fight to be seen or heard. You relax and trust that whoever is meant to see you or hear you will and that’s enough. You don’t have to achieve huge amounts or be a super star. You are enough just being you and doing what you love, living your life with kindness.

If you are intuitively guided to a large action packed life, so be it. But if you are intuitively guided to a simple and quiet life, that’s okay too. You may be in a phase of healing and integration. There may be a more outgoing phase later, but don’t covet it or thirst after it. Trust that what comes is what is needed for your highest growth and embodiment of the light this lifetime.

So going with the flow is not a passive nothingness, it is an active attention to the inner and outer signals guiding you forth as to what to do and when to do it. It is an active listening within and without for the guidance that may come from many different sources and in many different ways.

As you do this your intuition strengthens and you will get clearer and clearer signals. Sometimes, often, you will be asked to do something that is outside your comfort zone, that stretches you – you can resist out of fear or take the leap of faith trusting that you will be supported as you take the plunge into the depths of yourself and your purpose here on Earth.

You will experience exactly what you need for your evolution and growth. Life is leading us all forth, to achieve what matters most – insight and growth, connection with our heart, love, God and Mother Earth. We are all growing and evolving, and it is all happening as it needs to. Trust in that and flow with life. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (6 August 2018).

  • Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.
  • If you found this blog useful you may wish to consider purchasing a copy of Jodi-Anne’s book ‘Advice from a higher Source’ which contains 85 more answers to questions about life. The paperback book or ebook can be purchased online at – http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JMS2011. (Once you have clicked into view the description of the book, go to the top of the page and choose the flag symbol for your country, this will show you the price in your currency and enable you to purchase it in that currency)

How do you be authentic?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Healing from child abuse, Self help techniques

To be authentic means to be honest and show all of who you are to the world. You don’t pretend to be perfect or to have it all together. You show your humanness – your strengths, your doubts, fears and messiness. You show it all, accepting this too is part of who you are.

You don’t need to parade your weaknesses around. You just don’t actively hide them. You are not embarrassed about them. They are simply areas of your personality that have not yet healed into wholeness, into love and peace. They are your growing edge, your next steps. And it is wonderful that you are seeing them, acknowledging them, loving and accepting them, because then they can shift and dissolve.

Life is not as harsh as many think it is. These aspects surface to be released, to be felt into completion. If you willingly feel it, face it, breathe into it, acknowledge any earlier memories associated with it, love the younger part of you involved and bring it into your heart, then it dissolves, the pain goes.

It is only when we try to ignore it that it stays or gets louder, so we will look at it and hopefully embrace it. If we do, the shifting can be easier and we won’t need to attract people or situations to trigger us on that issue.

If you don’t heal the betrayal inside you, you will attract someone to betray you, so you feel those feelings and can heal. It happens to help you heal. But often us humans don’t realise that. We think the person hurting us is bad, broken, evil, unkind or unaware.

We think we are bad, broken, a victim, that life is unfair and cruel, and people can’t be trusted. This is all just wounding to be healed.

We are all innocent, all pure, and all capable of goodness and love, as it is our core nature. We are just clearing out density, so we can embody the light.

So if you have a habit or a thinking pattern or defensive mechanism that you are ashamed of, let go of the judgement. It’s just a habit to break.

Love and accept yourself, see what is going on, and be kind to yourself. Embrace yourself like you would if it was a child hurting, because it is. It’s your inner child, your younger self that needs help to let go of the hurts.

When you can look at it like this, it is easier to see there is nothing ‘wrong’ with you, nothing to hide. You are just a work in progress, we all are. We are all working towards wholeness – where we accept ourselves and others, and flow with life in loving and peaceful ways.

We all have aspects of ourselves that need upgrading or healing. We each have those annoying thought patterns or habits. Love yourself anyway. Be who you are. It’s okay to be you exactly as you are.

You don’t need to hide, or pretend to be better than you are, or hide how you are feeling to please another. You don’t have to pretend to be something you are not, or alter yourself to fit in with the crowd.

Be who you are and shine. Be who you are and love and accept yourself. When you do you will attract others who are also being authentically themselves, and you can enjoy life together, acknowledging each other’s gifts and areas for growth.

We all want to be seen as we are, to be loved and accepted. We just fear we will be rejected, seen as not good enough. If you have these fears it shows you a part of you is still hurting from past experiences. Go inside and heal that part, help it to let go of its pain. Listen to it. Embrace it. Breathe with it while it releases its emotions. Let it be healed by golden and rainbow light. Give it a place in your heart. Accept it and love it and the wound will disappear.

For it is your own love and acceptance you have been craving. When you give it, it is easier to be yourself and show it to the world, as you know you are okay. Even if someone does reject you or is cruel, it won’t destroy you. Just feel any emotional reaction and send love, knowing their reaction is about them and their inner state of pain or turmoil. It is not really about you.

When you are authentically yourself your energy levels rise, as you are no longer wasting energy hiding, or trying to figure things out, or guessing at what other’s want. You can just be yourself, smile and ask for what you want, trusting others to do the same.

You take responsibility for living your life peacefully and lovingly, doing kind acts wherever you go – when you want to, and when you don’t want to, you don’t. You can do whatever you feel like as long as it isn’t hurting anyone else. When we each take responsibility for balancing our own lives we will have fuller energy cups. We won’t be depleted. We won’t be exhausted trying to give from an empty cup. Instead we will overflow from fullness and joy.

It will be easy to give and have a positive impact as our energy field is clear and radiant. That is what it means to be authentically yourself, shining your light for all to see. No need to hide who you are.

You are a beautiful child of God, a masterpiece, just chipping away the rough edges to reveal the beautiful statue within the stone. It takes eons to wear away those rough edges. So be proud of them and of your progress.

No need to be perfect. It’s okay to be flawed, to be human. We each have a different mix of density – pain, thoughts, and patterns. We are each a unique kaleidoscope of life experiences, and we each have beauty. See the love and accept who you are.

Show that to the world and celebrate who you are warts and all! We all make smelly poo and farts. We all have snot and pus when infected. We all lose hair and skin cells and bleed. We are all of this, as well as our smiles, our light, and our love. It’s time to embrace it all and just be yourself. So be it. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (5 August 2018).

  • Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.
  • If you found this blog useful you may wish to consider purchasing a copy of Jodi-Anne’s book ‘Advice from a higher Source’ which contains 85 more answers to questions about life. The paperback book or ebook can be purchased online at – http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JMS2011. (Once you have clicked into view the description of the book, go to the top of the page and choose the flag symbol for your country, this will show you the price in your currency and enable you to purchase it in that currency)

How do we stop fighting against our lives?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Healing from child abuse, Personal Development, Self help techniques

You fight because you resist surrendering your defences and feeling your pain. It feels too big, overwhelming, obliterating. You sense the depths of emotional pain inside and you fight against facing it all.

Yet at the same time you search for solutions so you will feel better. You want it to be gentle, sanitised, easy, but emotional pain has to be felt and transmuted, felt into completion, loved and accepted. You get tired of layer after layer surfacing and wonder whether it will ever end. It won’t. It just changes form.

You are not lost or drowning, you just think you are. It is like you are in water that is deep enough that it has the illusion you can’t stand in. You swim or doggy paddle trying to stay afloat. You know you can only do it for so long. Eventually you have to give in, to let yourself sink. It is only then you realise you can actually stand and you are okay.

That is what you’re doing. You keep swimming or running or hiding when you don’t need to any more. It is safe for you to be still, to rest, to play, to look around and enjoy life, to connect with others. But part of you still flees, still fears bad things happening. Part of you still stays small hoping not to be noticed, worried what others may do to you.

You waste so much energy in fight or flight or trying to figure things out, solve imaginary problems, predict future outcomes in an attempt to avoid those you don’t like. What is meant to be will be. You can’t run away from it or hide. It will happen.

Surrender to your life’s plan and destiny. It was set before you were born. It was agreed to prior to incarnation. The movie starring you has already been made. It’s in the theatre, part way through screening, and you are waving your hands hoping to change it, to alter the script, but it is already done. What is going to occur will occur. You can’t prevent it or alter it dramatically, so stop wasting your energy fearing what is next, trying to control or manipulate it.

Accept what is and trust you will be led forth by God, by love, by your higher self, to experience what you need in order for you to heal and grow, for your soul’s evolution.

What is needed will occur. Some of it will be enjoyable and some of it will not, but it will all lead you forth to growth and integration of your higher self into your body, so you can shine your divine light and a heart full of love into the world.

You are being led to a good place. It is beneficial. You just doubt it, question it, mistrust it. You fight against it, but it is all happening for your highest good.

You know that tragedies lead to rethinking the way you live life. They lead to personal reflection, insight and growth. They serve a purpose. They come when they are needed. You can’t prevent it.

Stop wasting your energy worrying about ‘What if’s’. Half of what you imagine won’t happen and the other half will not be as bad as you imagine. It is all leading you forth to heal and open up to receiving and giving love more easily.

So relax and enjoy your life. Trust God’s plan. Slow down and have fun. Don’t worry so much. Don’t try to figure it all out. You don’t need to see what is up ahead. What matters are the next few steps. Be in this moment and see where your heart guides you. Listen to your body and its messages.

Slow down and BE. Integrate all the shifts and changes you have been through. Let your body adjust to the changes in vibration and your nervous system to relax out of survival mode into being mode. You can do it. You just need to stop. Stop all thinking about the future. Trust what is to come is good for you. Allow what is, to be what it is and know it will change if and when it is meant to.

You don’t have to work so hard. Rest, you deserve it. You need it. Simplify your life and make time for being, for enjoying yourself, doing things you love and spending time with people you can connect with heart to heart.

You are allowed to take time off, time out from work or study or responsibilities. Relax and be, that is what you need most, and that is how you stop fighting against your life. Accept it as it is.

We each have a unique journey designed for our soul’s evolution. Everyone will experience something different. Some people will have it easier than you and some more difficult. It depends what they are here to learn.

Those who experience deep challenges are keen souls, eager to evolve quickly. They have agreed to experience in one life, what other souls may do over 3 or 4 lives. They have chosen to condense it, so they can evolve more quickly, but that means this lifetime will be full of ups and downs, more chaos, more challenges and disasters than usual.

It can seem too much at times and this is why you fight against feeling the pain. You haven’t chosen a gentle path. You’ve chosen a steep and rocky one, and the best way to navigate it is slowly, step by step, taking time to breathe deeply, to connect to nature and its beauty and calming effects. There are lots of supports available as you navigate through your life.

Just accept what is and do what is needed to heal and balance up, but do it peacefully, slowly, don’t push too hard. Be kind to yourself and your body. It has been through so much and it needs you to treat it with reverence and love. Be that loving parent and best friend for yourself. That is what is needed, so you can relax and enjoy your life.

You can do it. You are and you will get better at it as you stop fighting against what is and you trust more in what is to come, for it is good, very good indeed. It leads you home to your heart with love. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (26 July 2018).

  • Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.
  • If you found this blog useful you may wish to consider purchasing a copy of Jodi-Anne’s book ‘Advice from a higher Source’ which contains 85 more answers to questions about life. The paperback book or ebook can be purchased online at – http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JMS2011. (Once you have clicked into view the description of the book, go to the top of the page and choose the flag symbol for your country, this will show you the price in your currency and enable you to purchase it in that currency)

Why do we look for approval?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Family Constellations, Parenting, Personal Development, Self help techniques

It is human nature to want to feel loved and secure. Feeling that way occurs when you have a strong sense of belonging – to your family, your tribe, your community, your social supports, friends, etc.

You feel safe and secure when you sense that you belong and are accepted by those around you. When you feel you don’t belong, when you feel excluded or in danger of being excluded, you feel terrified of dying, of being left alone to fend for yourself. This terror relates to tribal days when you did need to band together for survival, to hunt the wild animals that could attack anyone left on their own.

In today’s world it is not so dangerous to be on your own, but loneliness, the sense of isolation, rejection, of not being enough – all erodes your happiness and eventually your health. Studies have shown that those who are lonely and isolated suffer higher rates of chronic illness and shorter lifespans. It is almost like the will to live reduces, because it is so painful to live in isolation and darkness that comes when your thoughts are negative and self-loathing.

It is hard to love and accept yourself when you feel rejected by others. The issue may not be about you. It may be something specific to the group rejecting you, but it still feels bad to be rejected. This is why people will do bad things in a group. They will be immoral and do devilish things that they would not do on their own. They go along with the crowd, they don’t stand up and say “No, I don’t want to hurt that person or break that law. It is immoral and I won’t do it”.

It takes great strength to stand up in such a situation and say no. It risks being ostracised, losing your standing in the group, being rejected and hated. Few people have the courage to do so. Many go along with the crowd and silently regret it for the rest of their lives. This feeds self-disgust and loathing.

Sometimes this gets high enough that a person will leave the group on their own choice, as to stay feels unconscionable. But few people make that choice. Most stay and self-medicate through addiction to numb the painful thoughts and feelings. Others will project the self-hatred out onto their enemy, their chosen other, and this further fuels the conflict occurring.

All of this occurs because each person wants to feel that they belong, that they are accepted, and that they are an acceptable human being. Many of us doubt our worthiness, our goodness, we feel not enough. This comes from childhood conditioning, when our parents weren’t able to be there for us all the time we needed them, and occasionally they looked at us with frustration and tiredness. They gave us looks of desperation and we sensed that they wished we didn’t exist or that we were different to how we were.

This was just their tiredness and stress. It wasn’t really about us. It was about them and their circumstances, but we take those messages to heart and feel that we are somehow unacceptable.

No parent means to do that to their child. They love you and want what is best for you, but they did not have the energy reserves or capability to be always loving and positive in their interactions with us. No one could. It is very demanding being a parent. There are no times off. No vacations from the responsibility for that child and its life.

Most parents do their best to meet the child’s needs. Some do not. Some in their exhaustion and pain will blame the child for their adult problems. Some may even say it to their child, saying “If it wasn’t for you I could have….. If it wasn’t for you I would have….You ruined my life, etc, etc”. Some parents can be very cruel even saying that they wish the child had not been born.

All of this negativity gets taken to heart by the child, who then has such inner turmoil and emotional pain that they may rebel, turn away from the parents and look for love and belonging elsewhere. This is what leads to gang membership. The person finds a group where they are accepted and approved of. They will do whatever they need to, in order to join and stay apart of their new family.

Thankfully most of us just join a sporting club or community activity or friends group where we feel held and safe and accepted.

All of us try to find somewhere, where we will be accepted and gain a sense of approval, a feeling that we are good enough, we do belong, and we are okay.

Some will try desperately to please their parents, bending over backwards doing whatever they ask, in a desperate plea for acceptance and belonging. Some parents will give that to their children and some will continue to manipulate the child well into adulthood in order to get what they want.

All of this could be avoided or reduced if there was more support for parents when they have their children. If parents with newborns were more supported, whether that be by family, friends, community or government services, it would make it easier for them to be more positive in their interactions with their children.

Most parents unfortunately are exhausted, over tired, fatigued and living on adrenaline, coffee or sugar to get by. It is not a healthy way to be, and it is inevitable that problems will occur. It is hard enough coping with children as a couple. It is even harder as a single parent.

Parents need support so that they can enjoy their time with their children more, so that they can have a more balanced life, with time for them to relax, do a hobby, and have some fun. Without this balance the parents will be in deficit and the kids will feel that and absorb it, feeling like there is something wrong with them, when there isn’t.

The above patterning is the reason for so many people desperately seeking approval. There are solutions at the societal level as discussed, but there are also solutions at the individual level.

We need to recognise any self-lacking thoughts and change them to more positive, self-affirming thoughts. We need to feel our emotional pain from past interactions and be loving and supportive of our self.

Doing inner child work is powerful, reclaiming those younger parts of us that split off, that hid or became tough to survive. We need to welcome those younger selves back into our hearts, give them the love that they missed out on, and welcome them home to our hearts, to know that they are okay and they belong with us.

When we integrate these disowned parts within us, we will no longer feel rejected by the world so much. We can do inner visualisations and Family Constellations with our parents to heal that split and to connect in with their hearts, their goodness, and their love for us.

There are many ways to do this, so that we feel more complete, more accepted and have a stronger sense of belonging, knowing we are okay, we are enough and all is okay as it is.

When we can heal our pain from our pasts and come to a place of self-acceptance and acceptance of our life how it was, is, and will be, then and only then will we drop the need for approval, as we know that we are okay.

Approval then becomes something that is nice, but not needed. We can be our authentic, creative self, showing our heart’s true desires to the world, following our heart’s longings without fear of ridicule or rejection, knowing that if it does occur it won’t cripple us, as we know we are okay.

Criticism can then be seen as another person’s opinion, which is about them, it is not about us. Any barbed spears they throw simply bounce off as there is no wound for them to land in.

When we love and accept our self, we go forth into the world and shine our light confidently, lovingly and securely, knowing we are good enough and all beings are. This is what we hope for all beings, to reach this place of love and acceptance, of self-approval. When that manifests we will have a much more peaceful time on Earth. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (24 July 2018).

  • Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.
  • If you found this blog useful you may wish to consider purchasing a copy of Jodi-Anne’s book ‘Advice from a higher Source’ which contains 85 more answers to questions about life. The paperback book or ebook can be purchased online at – http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JMS2011. (Once you have clicked into view the description of the book, go to the top of the page and choose the flag symbol for your country, this will show you the price in your currency and enable you to purchase it in that currency)

How do you accept someone’s fate?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Conscious Evolution, Health, Personal Development, Relationships

When someone is given a bad diagnosis it is tempting to try and fix them, to take control and try to rectify it all. This is not what is needed. Drop through the defensive reactions and feel the pain leading you to step into rescuing. It is your pain – your sadness that your friend is sick or dying or has suffered some great loss. It is your anger at feeling helpless and unable to resolve it. It is your fear of upsetting them by not doing enough or doing the wrong thing, saying or not saying the right thing. Stop trying so hard. This is not about you.

Your friend is in pain, just be there for them. Just hold their hand, comfort them, listen to them. Ask them what they need or want from you and do what they say. They may not want to rush off seeking miraculous cures half way around the globe. You would, but they might not. They may choose to spend whatever remaining time they have with their loved ones, enjoying their home, pets, favourite food and spaces. They may want to slow down, surrender, accept their fate and die peacefully with those they care most about.

Yes, you could research diets, treatments, cures on their behalf and share that information. You could do that and it is indeed kind and coming from a loving space. But can you do it peacefully or are you losing your peace, your balance, your self-alignment in your desperate quest to help the other?

What is it deep down that you are afraid of facing: your friend’s demise, your own, your buried emotions from the past? Work through whatever arises for you with kindness and compassion. You don’t have to suffer or feel guilty for being alive. You don’t have to stop living your life, just because they are unwell. You don’t have to drop everything to be there all the time. Send love, do what you can do peacefully and rest. You do not need to make yourself sick too.

We all die at some time. We will all perish one way or another. Sometimes it happens slowly, sometimes quickly, sometimes unexpectedly and sometimes way too soon. That is life. There are no guarantees here, so do what you can to enjoy your life, to love fully and have an open heart, spreading joy wherever you go. If you live this way you are making a positive impact with every breath and step you take, with all who you interact with. When you live this way, with an open, loving heart, you are being of great service to the planet and to humanity who will remember you fondly when you do return to Heaven and to those loved ones waiting for you on the other side.

Remember that when people die they re-enter the realm of unconditional love, of peace and contentment, of non-duality. They reunite with their loved ones, with God, their Guides and Angels. They get to be home in Heaven; to review their life just lived, to see how they did throughout their journey, where they grew and evolved, and where they still have room to grow. This then becomes the focus of their next life, so they can heal and master that issue.

It is all a progression to being able to embody your higher self on Earth, a growing to perfection and completion, so that you can be unconditionally loving and united with God while in the body. So this is not the end. It is just one transition in many that occur as a Soul evolves from one incarnation to the next.

So it is not a tragedy, not something to be mourned. It just means your friend is coming to the end of this lifetime. She has learned her lessons, experienced what she needed to experience and is ready for the next step on her adventure. And if she is not yet complete, then she will live on despite the diagnoses.

People do defy their clinical diagnoses every day. People live longer than they are told they will. Some do experience unexplainable cures – from the medical perspective. Some live on and some die. It is not up to you. It is up to the person and God, and what they chose as their life plan before incarnating on Earth.

So let go of trying to rescue or fix or deny your feelings of helplessness. Accept the truth: you are sad your friend is sick. You wish it wasn’t happening and that you could make it all better. Part of you wants to cry, to yell, to fight, but the best thing to do is to surrender, to accept what is, and to accept your friend’s choices, no matter what they choose. Whether it be to rest and go out gracefully or to search for a cure and more time. It is their choice, not yours. So let go of control and breathe. Breathe through all the emotions and fears and come back to love. Come back to love and just be there, willing to do whatever your friend wants you to do.

Yes you can provide some information on cures, diets, healers, etc, but then let go. Let them choose in their own time. This is their journey, their process and much is occurring inside them. A serious health diagnosis is a catalyst for great change within a person. It causes huge amounts of self-reflection, realisations and insights. It leads to great spiritual growth and Soul healing. This is its purpose. It is a phase of massive, rapid shifting of core beliefs, attitudes and ways of being. It is a catalyst for growth and change. It is not meaningless or random. It has great purpose and it is serving the person, even if it looks like it is not.

All who are affected, who know the ill person will be altered. Their process causes great shifts and evolution in all they know. Each person will be triggered in different ways due to their past. They will face and work through these triggers to find balance and love, or they will fall further into disconnection, loss and addiction. Each will grow as a result of their love for the person who is sick and their response to it. See how big a catalyst for change these situations are.

Each person will grow, will reflect on how they are living their life and make changes to operate more in accordance with their heart.

Some will do so out of fear, thinking they need to enjoy life as much as they can while they still can.

Some will want to create a positive legacy to be remembered by, to do good and feel like their life has helped others, made a difference.

Some will start to live more simply, letting go of stress, busy-ness and consumerism, realising you can’t take it with you and your time is more precious than the things.

Some will focus more on connecting heart to heart with others, deepening friendships and connections as these are what last in the long term, as opposed to things.

There can be many different reactions, but see how they all lead to growth. See how your friend’s illness not only is a catalyst for her, but for all those who love her and wish her well. See how much she is being of service to you all with what she is going through. See how perfect the design of life is. You may not like what occurs, but it all occurs for a reason and that reason is evolution and growth.

Remember you are not your bodies, you are Souls having a vacation on Earth to learn and grow, and at some stage the vacation ends, and you return home to those who love you and celebrate your growth and evolution with you, until you choose your next incarnation and adventure on Earth. Death is not the end, just a stepping stone in a path of many lifetimes, leading you home to love and peace within. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (21 July 2018).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How to accept where people are at?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Conscious Evolution, Relationships, Self help techniques

Are you struggling to accept someone’s choices or journey? Here is a blog I channelled on ‘How to accept where people are at’.

Amongst your community there are many people with low levels of awareness, that does not make them wrong or less than you or others who are more aware of life and the larger reasons for it. All beings are exactly where they need to be for their evolution and growth. All are awakening and becoming conscious at the rate that is best for them.

Some who appear less conscious, actually are highly evolved beings who have chosen particularly hard life paths to attempt to master a particular skill. You cannot tell someone’s level of awareness by looking at them or analysing them with your mind. You can only glimpse it through your heart, through witnessing their heart in action, their vibration, their kindness to other beings.

Those who are lofty in knowledge are not necessarily living that knowledge. They may know what it means to be aware, conscious, God-like beings. This does not mean they do it, be it, breathe it – have embodied it. They will in time. Often gaining a lot of knowledge occurs because there is deep pain to be released and they are avoiding feeling and releasing it, by staying stuck in their heads, not in their bodies where the pain is located.

In time when they are ready they will drop down into the pain, feel it, release it and balance back up. Everyone does this when they finally feel safe enough, loved enough and trusting enough that they will cope and come out the other side.

It takes time to build emotional awareness and ability to feel what is truly going on inside, to drop down and listen, to feel into that inner silence and allow forth that which needs your presence and allowance to surface, to enable your freedom once it is released.

To do it sooner than you are truly ready for just results in fear, results in retraumatisation and disillusion. To push too far before you have the ability to process it safely harms the body, as you reattach to the emotion and the story, instead of just witnessing it and letting it go. People need to learn these skills first, learn how to sit in the pain and not own it, just let it float by. They need to learn to trust life to hold them, care for them and provide for them. This only gets learned through experience of synchronicities and life’s majestic gifts, when things happen unexplainably showing you there is a bigger plan unfolding and you are just one small part of that.

People cannot be told about this and embody it, they have to experience it and it takes time. This is why you can plant seeds of awareness, but can’t make them blossom. Life will do that and it takes each plant a different amount of time, water, love and growth to do it.

So as an educator or helper the best thing you can do is share your story, your experiences of the mysteries of life to give another hope, inspiration and a little more faith and trust. Then let go, let life lead them forth and provide them with their own miracles, to open their hearts and let them heal. You cannot make it happen. You cannot rescue or fix anyone. God will do it perfectly at the right time for that person. So do not lose sleep worrying about others or trying to figure out how to help them realise the truth or release their pain. Life will do it, life will guide them forth.

The best you can do is vibrate in as close a state of love and acceptance as you can, then your energy will help uplift theirs and hold the space for their awakening to life and its larger mysteries. Just love and accept them and know they will be led forth to their magnificence when the time is right. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (27 September 2016).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

What is suicide? How best to help someone feeling suicidal?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Healing from child abuse, Health, Personal Development, Self help techniques

Suicide is a way of escaping emotional pain that has become too strong to bear. The person is overwhelmed by life and unsure of how to cope or what to do. They sense it would be easier to leave and return into nothingness. They may or may not be aware that to do so is to return to God, to unconditional love and support that is available to all of us while still in the body.  We can access this support by asking for it. That is what prayer is – you are asking for love and support to help you through tough times.

Each can pray easily just by asking “Lord, please help me to overcome my burdens and release them at a rate my body can handle. Please help me find the strength to carry on, the humility to ask for and accept help, and the humbleness to sing your praises. Thank you Lord for your help and support. Please hold my hand as I walk forth on this journey which feels too much for me right now”.

Anyone can pray. If you don’t feel comfortable asking Jesus, ask Mother Mary, God, The Universe, Mother Nature. It matters not who you ask, but that you do ask. Ask and you shall receive. Listen quietly within to hear the answer, to feel the support and gain the insight and clarity you need.

Many people when they hit rock bottom do so because they feel alone, lost, abandoned, disappointed with life, they feel it is meaningless, that there is no point going on. You can help someone in such a state by loving and accepting them, by doing fun things together, even if it is just watching cartoons, sitting in nature, massaging their feet, eating cake, having a laugh. You want to lighten their spirits in whatever way will work.

Just telling them how much you care and would miss them helps, but it also creates a pressure, a feeling of guilt for the person and this isn’t helpful. They are already burdened enough without adding more for them to feel bad about.

It is more effective to say “I love you and I see you are struggling to stay here on Earth. I respect your right to choose to leave or stay. I hope you choose to stay because I do love you, value you and want you in my life. However, if you feel you must go I will accept your choice. It will be hard, but I will honour you and your life and remember you fondly. I will make something good out fo it, even if you can’t at this stage. Know you have had a beneficial impact on me, you have helped me in so many ways, just by being my friend/family member. We have shared so much and I thank you for that. I hope we get to continue sharing life together, but if not I respect your choice and I will look upon you fondly and hold you in my heart. You are very special to me and always will be, no matter what you choose”.

This makes it clear that they are loved, wanted, cherished and respected. That is what the person is longing for to feel connected, valued, heard. They don’t want to be lectured at, rescued or made to feel guilty. They don’t want to be called selfish or broken / damaged / worthless, they are already feeling that.

By respecting their choice you are giving them permission to make a change in their life. They may have been feeling weighted down by life and now you are helping them to see they have choices, more choices than they realised.

Don’t ask too much of them. Let them be, send love regularly and hold them in your heart. Pray to the angels to take care of them and let go of trying to figure it out / control it. You can’t. You simply can’t. If the person chooses to die – it is their choice, not yours. If it is their destined time to go, you can’t stop it. If it isn’t they will stay regardless of what you do.

Remember to honour yourself and your family throughout all of this. Be there for them too. It is a big ask for all involved, as everyone’s emotions and hurts will be triggered. It leads to lots of growth in all who are affected, if they truly allow themselves to feel their pain and listen to their hearts.

Life is not easy. We all go through our ups and downs. Know that suicide is just another way to die. It is not a particularly bad sin or problem. The person will still be welcomed and loved by God. They will find peace and healing on the other side and they will get to return to Earth and try again. They will reexperience a similar situation, so they can play out an alternative outcome. This can occur many times, until the person finds a way to cope, survive and thrive. It is part of their soul’s evolution and expansion.

So do not judge another who suffers. Don’t fear they will go to Hell and be punished. Don’t sacrifice yourself and your needs trying to rescue them. They need to feel empowered, not weak. They need to know they have choices, rights, etc, so that they can have a sense of power. Find what brings them joy, what they love and do that – be it a hobby, gardening, travel, etc. Find ways to help lift their moods and bring joy into their life. These are the best things you can do.

And know that if you lose patience, if you get frustrated and angry, if you explode at them about it all, that’s okay too. Just apologise afterwards and explain how hard it is for you to watch them in pain and how you wish you could take it away. Tell them how much you worry and that you know it doesn’t help, but it’s hard not to do. Show kindness to yourself and them. It helps more than you know. Blesed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne M Smith (22 November 2017).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

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How to focus on the goodness in your life and stop complaining?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Conscious Evolution, Self help techniques

It is human nature to notice what you do and don’t have, to see what others are doing and compare that to what you see in your own life. But everyone is here to have different experiences. You get exactly what you need for your personal growth, healing and evolution of your Spirit, your consciousness. Nothing happens by accident, it is all purposeful – serving a positive purpose to assist you in your awakening.

When you notice undesirable elements in your life, you do so to be triggered, to feel and release emotion, to heal, to motivate you to take action to change it, if you so desire. Many of you however, choose just to grumble about your life, to feel stuck, lost and focused on complaining about what is wrong. This lowers your vibration, your vitality, it flattens and deadens you. It leads to stagnation and decay. It is the road to depression and sadness.

Instead, when you notice yourself starting to feel flat, negative, sad – stop and rest. Acknowledge a part of you is tired, lonely, scared, angry – whatever it is. Send love to that part of you, knowing that it needs your love, your acceptance, and your attention. Showing care to that part of yourself, will help it to feel better and will boost your energy levels back up.

This  type of subpersonality or inner child work is so important, because it is they who are upset, not you. The Adult part of you is fine, able to make decisions and choices, able to focus on the now and flow with what is. You just have to be able to access the Adult part of you to stay in or return to balance.The Adult trusts, is resourceful and capable. When the Child takes over it feels moody, lonely, it can be negative or pessimistic, but all it is really wanting is some love, to play and have fun, to cuddle a teddy or dog, to be seen, heard, listened to and valued. Then it will let go of its sad or angry or disappointed, hurt or betrayed feelings and focus on enjoying life. It wants to have fun, not wallow, but it needs help to move out of its emotional ruts and tantrums. Send love, talk to and listen to its needs.

The Child is within us all, the younger parts of ourselves, that hold the memories of all that we have been through, that hold our hopes and dreams that we formed in our younger years. They take stock of what was, is and will be. They think they know what is going to happen, based on what has happened, but life is constantly changing.There is always room for growth, for new things, to enter as you clear out the old and make space vibrationally for higher vibrating energy to enter your field. The more you clean out the old, the more new energy and stuff – manifestation can occur.

Life is always moving you forward in a positive direction, but you have to feel and release the buried trauma, emotions, defense mechanisms and controlling energies in order to receive the new. So you will go through challenges to trigger you, to help you release, so you can get your new desired items / way of being in life. It is a cleansing process that has to occur.

If you find yourself stuck in the mire of it all, take some deep breaths, comfort your inner child and choose to rest, to honour your needs for sleep, food, nurturance, fun. Honour where you are at and you will help your body to shift out of that energy, that mood and allow your vibration to rise above it. Don’t keep pushing on or dragging your feet until you are totally exhausted or sick. Listen to your body and its needs. Listen, respond and heal, and you will feel so much better.

You can use a wide range of tools and techniques to help shift your vibration, release the old energies, enabling your energy and mood to elevate. Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE) is one process you can use at home for free once you have learned how to do it.

TRE is the body’s natural, built in mechanism for shaking out tension, stress and trauma. Just as your body will subconsciously react in fight, flight or freeze, it also has a subconscious process to help the nervous system to unwind those reactions and to calm back down into a socially engaged state, where you feel safe to play and interact with others.

TRE enables the body to release its contractions, its tightness, its buried tension and emotions bit by bit. Like letting steam out of a pressure cooker so that it doesn’t explode.

TRE supports your body and your health. When you are caught in defensive patterns your body feels like it is fighting to survive, so it focuses its energy on that. Blood flow goes to your arms and legs to enable you to fight or run away. Your digestive system, immune system, reproductive system and much more gets less focus as the body considers these less important than escaping the tiger or threat you’re facing.

The body assumes if you get away from the danger then when you are safe it can return its focus to the health promoting and maintenance activities. Unfortunately many people stay in fight or flight or freeze, in high stress defensive patterns for long periods of time. The body doesn’t get the message that you’re safe now and it should focus its energy back into your health promoting activities. It really is important to do that inner work so your body can function more fully. TRE can help with this.

As you shake out that built up tension, stress and trauma your inner child is willing to talk to you more. They like it as you start to relax and can be more playful. They like to see you are taking care of yourself. Even though your outer world may not have changed that much, it becomes easier to appreciate all you have, to be grateful and enjoy your now more.

You feel better inside and this radiates out enabling your outer world to improve too. This is how you can change your life bit by bit for free at home, by shaking off your tension, stress and trauma. It’s worth doing so you can enjoy life more and stop complaining.

You have what you have to help you heal. As you heal what you have will change. So it doesn’t matter if you have what you want right now, because it will shift. Focus on the journey, on enjoying each moment, on allowing your life to progress and advance. Don’t stay stuck, wallowing in what is. Release it and trust what is to come, for it is good indeed. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne M Smith (9 November 2017).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

If you find this information useful consider donating to support the sharing of more useful information, even $5 is a great help.

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How to move out of survival and live?

by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, posted in Healing from child abuse, Personal Development, Self help techniques

Many of you who have had deep pain and hurt in your younger lives have learned to survive by doing whatever is necessary to get through your day. You work, you smile, you help, you laugh and you hide away at home when you can because that feels safe. In essence you are still expecting attack and you work hard to avoid it. Your focus is on getting through each day without attack, with minimal dnager, conflict and abuse. You collapse at the end of the day exhausted, satisfied to have survived and to have gotten through relatively unscathed.

In doing this you are simply surviving each day, you are not enjoying your life very much or creating what you really want. You are not living your authentic self, you are using a range of cover ups and defense mechanisms to protect your vulnerable, scared child. That feels more important than having fun, socialising. This is true for many of you.

There are others who are also just surviving, but they focus on pleasure and not much else. They have given up trying to achieve anything or to be successful in their chosen path. They have given up on their dreams believing it isn’t worth the effort to pursue them. They settle for comfort food, alcohol, drugs, sex and a simplistic, hedonistic life, without contributing very much to society.

There are many survival patterns, underneath them all is pain, pain waiting to be felt and released, so you can step up and show your true self to the world, so you can enjoy life and contribute to the welfare of all by shining your light brightly.

You do not need to stay hidden, small to be safe. You don’t need to keep yourself small, stuck to feel like you have no control, no choice, no option. You do have options. Every day, every hour, every minute you are making choices affecting your health and wellbeing. You choose to do nothing or to sulk or pout or be angry or disappointed or to feel hopeless, like there’s no point trying. You choose to repeat the same mundane day over and over – go to work, eat, sleep, wake up, repeat over and over. You choose to numb out and watch TV or to eat or drink or whatever method you use to escape your dissatisfaction with your life. You are choosing to be stuck, to be a survivor or victim of life and your experiences.

You could be choosing to do something new, to try a new hobby, to connect with people and do activities, to have fun and socialise. You can choose to do study to work towards a career change or to volunteer at a nursing home or food shelter or other act of service, which not only helps others but results in you feeling better about yourself and your life. There is so much you could choose to do, but you have to choose it. You have to action it, take the risk for things to change.

Don’t let your life slip away. Take charge and live it. Flow with what life brings you, the ups and the downs, and make the most of it. When you get triggered or you get insight into your defense mechanisms, your pain, work through them to heal them and free yourself up. You don’t have to stay stuck in the old patterns and pain – free yourself and live.

One way to do this is using Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE). It can help you to calm your nervous system and body, so it drops out of fight, flight or freeze. TRE is a simple set of exercises to activate the body’s own tremoring mechanism which uses up the stress chemicals, cortisol and andrenaline, which get created when we are triggered and stored in our body if we don’t actually fight or run away.

TRE can be learned in an individual appointment online or an appointment in person. Then you can use it at home whenever you want to as a part of your self care routine.

When your nervous system calms, your body relaxes and it’s easier to make new choices and changes to behaviour, as your neocortex comes back online, the rational decision making part of the brain. When we’re in fear the amygdala and emotional part of the brain, the hind brain take over and focus on survival only. This is why it can be hard to think or make decisions when you are scared. The rational part of the brain has shut down so you can respond instinctively, quickly to increase your chance of survival.

You don’t have time to contemplate your choices when a lion is chasing you. You need to act fast and run or hide/freeze hoping not to be discovered. If you’re going to be brave and fight you need those extra stress hormones to give you the energy and drive to charge in. Your body will also fill you with opioids so you don’t feel pain as much, just in case you do get hurt or worst case scenario killed. The opioids numb the pain. They also are part of the dissociation process, helping you to feel less connected to your body, so you don’t feel what is happening to it.

TRE can help you to unwind all of these patterns and stored energies in your body, so you can be relaxed and at ease, more able to make choices from a calm state and to enjoy your life.

It is time to have fun, to be free, to shine your light, to do what you missed out on, to experiment and discover what you enjoy in life. It is time to LIVE, choose it and the Universe will help you do it. CONNECT with nature, with yourself, with others. Let yourself be seen, heard, supported and loved. Let the goodness in, it is all around you, waiting for you to open your arms to receive it. It is time, it is overdue, it is banging on the door hoping you will hear it. Step up, speak up, live your life and let go of the old ways. It’s time to live more fully, not just survive. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne M Smith (23October 2017).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

If you find this information useful consider donating to support the sharing of more useful information, even $5 is a great help.

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