How to overcome disappointment with your life?

pathDisappointment comes from wishing things had been different, from being unhappy with what was. But as you hold yourself in that place of unhappiness your future can not be happy. So to overcome disappointment with your life you need to learn to be happy and accept what is.

No matter what life brings you, you can always choose happiness. It is a choice. You can choose to celebrate the gifts you do have – food, shelter, friends, a job. Even if you don’t like the job or the home, at least you have one. Appreciate them. Appreciate all the good in your life, then things can improve.

are you happyLiterally, as you chose to focus on what you want and taking steps towards it, you create the future anew and positive, supportive chemicals in your body. As you focus on the old, on the fact that nothing changes or that you have missed out on so much, you are creating sad, depressive chemicals in your body, which is why your body will then feel lethargic, at a loss, no motivation to do anything. You are bogging yourself down with heavy baggage. You have to let it go.

Doing so involves living in the moment, creating fun and joy. Do this. It can be as simple as playing some music that uplifts you or makes you laugh and want to dance. Light candles, incense and decorate your home in such a way that it feels a peaceful, happy place to dwell. Colour can really help to brighten things up. Spending time in nature also helps lighten the load – the green of the grass, trees, shrubs, etc opens our heart chakra back up, so we can feel connected, held, supported.

Your parents did the best they knew how and while you may wish that was different, it is the truth, and what occurred is what happened. You can’t change that and no matter how much you wish it was different, it can’t be. It has happened. Your choice is to waste your now upset about it or to use your energy to create an enjoyable now and a future you will enjoy and be proud of.

If nagging thoughts, sadness and preoccupation with the past continues to haunt you, then see a therapist to help you ‘unhook’ from it. There are many ways to do this – EFT, Psych-K, Lifeline Technique and more. Lots of ways to change subconscious beliefs and patterning that keeps you stuck in the old way. Family constellations can help shift the dynamics in the family so love can flow freely from the ancestors to the current generation. These are energetic processes that can help free you from what was and find peace. They don’t change the past but help you to see them and react to them differently. It doesn’t matter what the others involved do now. They don’t have to change for you to be happy. It is you who has to change, to see the truth of what is and to take responsibility for creating a life you desire.

be what you needAcknowledge the sadness of your inner child who is waiting for you to love him/her and to play with him/her. You can be the best parent to yourself. You can talk nicely to yourself, buy yourself presents, take yourself on excursions and outings to fun and interesting places. You can nurture yourself with massage and treats. You can cook yummy, healthy food for yourself and go on adventures. You are the one who can free yourself and give yourself the love that you need.

Literally, you can talk to your inner child and comfort him/her, give him/her a hug and hold her close. You can bring him/her into your heart chakra and tell him/her how much you love him/her and how precious he/she is. If you don’t have time to go on an actual outing, you can do a guided visualisation with your inner child and see yourself having fun.

It is up to you, you have to choose to prioritise time for having fun, for making your life how you want it to be. Next time a disappointment thought comes up change it to something more positive and take action to have fun – to do something you always wanted to do but didn’t get to do. Go dancing, play a sport, go camping, have an adventure. Do it. Do it. Do it.

If you are finding it difficult to choose to do things differently, to see the goodness around you, it can be because you still have emotional pain inside – be it sadness, anger or resentment. This creates stress and tension in your body.

It helps to release the stress and tension so that your body relaxes more, you feel lighter and then it is easier to do something different. While you are weighed down with the heavy baggage you feel sluggish, lethargic and like there’s no point trying, it’s too hard.

There are many ways to release stress and tension out of your body. One that I use and teach others is Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE). TRE is literally a process for activating the body’s natural stress, tension and trauma releasing process. Your body will shake out all that no longer serves it over time, freeing you of the density and enabling you to lighten up and have fun. To see examples of TRE in use and to learn more about it visit the TRE page of my website.

The mundane can be made extraordinary when you release your stress and emotional pain, change your self-talk and subconscious programming.

bad attitude flat tire change itWho says your life should be any different? Why does life owe you more? Who do you think you are to know more than God? Your life was set before you incarnated. You chose the lessons you wanted to master and the people and situations to help you do so. It is all unfolding as it needs to and life brings you the events, people and situations to help you grow. When you accept this and flow with what is, life is much easier. It is only when we resist this, fight against it, etc, that we struggle. So let go of the struggle and flow with life. It really is okay to do so and you deserve it. You deserve to be happy and enjoy your life. Let go of expectations and accept what is. Choose to enjoy each day, to see the beauty all around you, to see the smile and joy of children, animals and nature. It is up to you – choose to see and feel the joy or choose the gloom and doom. You are harming yourself if you choose to stay stuck. You can move forward as soon as you are willing to let go of the past, be in the now, and take action to create the future you desire. You can do it. It is worth the effort. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (10 Sept 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

Why is mental illness increasing?

hate and love selfThere are higher rates of mental illness in society as people are living more disconnected lives. Parents are busy working and earning money for possessions, they do not have the depth or quality time required for deep bonding with a child. Without the bonding children do not develop a strong sense of being loved, lovable, acceptable or okay. They are left wondering whether they are lovable or not. This is the seed of mental illness – this questioning of self, this doubt as to one’s acceptability or not. It leads to self hatred / abuse and less ability to connect deeply with others for fear of rejection and loss.

People therefore isolate themselves and feel lonely, cold, separate and this too is emotionally painful. All of these sad, negative feeling emotions get bottled up and become the dominant, most common feelings in their life experience. Naturally this low vibration state results in depression and passivity. The person feels stuck, unable to pull themselves out of the situation.

Poor diet makes the situation worse and can result in sugar and hormone imbalances. Lack of exercise also results in imbalances that could be easily rectified. Serotonin and other brain chemicals can be balanced naturally – rest, spend time in nature, nurture and love yourself. This is hard to do when you feel you don’t deserve love or aren’t worthy of it. It feels like a waste of time to try and improve when it feels so bad and overwhelming.

Clearly it is at the mental level and emotional level that most work needs to be done to clear up negative thinking and expectations and open up to love. The emotions need to be felt and released so the person can balance back up to their natural state of peace and joy. It is possible. They just have to do the healing/transformational work.

False chemicals can help in the short term e.g. antidepressants or hormones/brain chemicals. But it is better if the body heals itself and starts producing the required chemical itself. This can and does happen. Exercise increases levels of serotonin and other endorphins, diet can also influence it, as of course can changes in thinking. The body can rebuild itself.

You live at paces that your body was not designed for. The frantic busyness of modern life leads to stress, fatigue and burn out. More and more people are affected and when they can’t cope internally with the pressure of their life it gets called mental illness. However, the solution in most cases is simple – simplify your lives; heal your emotional pain; learn to love and accept who you are; learn to be the the kind parent to yourself that you needed when little; learn to laugh and play and accept what comes; let go of trying to control life or impress others. Be yourself. That is enough. Life wants you to be your authentic self – live from your heart – follow / act on your passions, be of service to all in your own unique way.

By liberating yourself from the rat race, you show others it can be done and that they also could choose to do it – to choose freedom, simplicity, health, deeper connection with self, others and the Earth. This is healthy. This is how you are meant to live. It is all about love. If children are conceived in love, raised with love, learn how to love and respect themselves, others and the Earth there would be lower rates of mental illness.

Yes the pollution of food, air, water, soil does have some impact, but it is relatively minor compared to the internal pollution from negative, self loathing thoughts and painful emotions locked inside. These eat away at your spirit, your zest for life and leave you feeling flat, exhausted and low – a recipe for lethargy, depression and therefore mental illness.

Have a spring clean of your internal closet and let go of the darkness. Let the light, bright, colourful aspects of yourself come to the fore. You truly can enjoy life more fully. You just have to clean out the old and make room for the new to enter and anchor into your vibration. You can heal all pains with time, energy, love and awareness.

See the bigger picture and purpose of life, realise that ‘negative’ events in your life occurred to help you grow and evolve and are leading you onto something greater in yourself that could not have been achieved without that event.

bad events 3 responsesLife is a mystery. Things happen. You can’t control it, but you can choose how you respond to it. You can choose to wallow in pain and regret and depression or choose to make the most of what you have and live life fully embracing all that comes your way – the choice is yours.

Mental illness or health is a choice in the sense that you can learn the skills to bring you back to balance, back to peace and joy.

Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE) can help you to discharge the tension and stress in your body that has you on hyper alert. It can help your body and nervous system to calm down so that you can see more clearly rather than seeing through the lens of trauma and past experiences.

TRE can help set you free of the emotional pain and discharge it so that you can live in the now seeing life around you from a more open and positive perspective. While the pain and trauma is inside you it taints your view of the world and prevents you from relaxing, feeling safe and enjoying life more fully.

TRE can be done at home regularly to help you slowly, bit by bit to release the tension and flow more freely with life. If you have trouble moving through your emotions when they come up you may need to work with a TRE provider first for a little while so you can learn to self-regulate, but after that you can use it for free for the rest of your life as a tool to help you reduce stress, tension and trauma so you can live life more peacefully doing what you want in life.

You can’t control what happened in your past or what will occur in the future, but you can control how you respond to it and how you let it affect your life. Your reactions are your choice and you can change the way you react by altering your thoughts; altering your emotional balance inside; and by changing your expectations or core beliefs. There are many ways to do this. They are just skills to learn, that all of humanity would benefit from, so you could all live in peace and harmony.

By Jodi-Anne (31 July 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How to move through depression and find peace

hot air balloonDepression occurs when a person has not been able to express their emotions and has bottled them up inside. Their bodies are full of sadness, grief, anger and emotional pain – shame, guilt and more. Through life’s many challenges the person has faced the difficulty, but come out of it wounded, disappointed and dismayed – wondering if that is all there is to life.

In their dismay and disappointment they shut down from life and the possibility of joy, love and peace. They come to expect further hurt, loss and pain, so [they] hide away from life and interacting with others who they fear will judge and ridicule them for feeling the way they do.

What they don’t realise is that everyone goes through challenges, disappointments, and disturbances to life as they knew it. Things happen. People die, jobs end, heart attacks occur. These challenges come unexpectedly and can knock a person from peace and balance into a negative spin. Every one goes through it. There is no shame in struggling to cope with life’s pressures. You just need to learn how to process and release the emotions, the pent up energy and pain, so that you return to a state of balance and peace. 

Mental work is required to adjust thinking patterns and come to allow hope, positive expectations of the future – to know ‘Good things can and will happen for me’; ‘I am a good person and I deserve good things’.

Often once a person feels blue they start to beat themselves up – to feel less than others, not okay, incompetent. This just worsens the situation as they then get stuck at home not wanting to go out and face the world. They don’t want to reach out for help or tell anyone as they are so embarrassed and ashamed, but really reaching out is what is needed.

Trying something new, making friends, having fun, speaking your truth, feeling your emotions and breathing through them, learning to witness them and not be overwhelmed by them – creating distance between them and you – the emotions and your true self – all help. They are just skills that need to be learned, as is being nice and supportive to yourself – eating well, exercising, moving through emotions with kindness to self, nurturing and nourishing self.

Many people when depressed feel like trash, worthless and that is how they treat themselves. They need to move from that to seeing themselves as someone who has temporarily lost focus and just needs love and support to get back on track.

be what you needThey need to become the kind, loving parent to themselves – giving themselves permission to rest when needed and to play and enjoy life. It sounds easy to do, but it is very challenging as when you are depressed your energy is so dense, low in vibration, that it is hard to hear your intuition or higher self. It is hard to get guidance from within or from spirit. You don’t feel the spiritual support all around you as your vibration is such that their messages can’t get through.

  • You can shift your vibration higher by movement – exercise or dance.
  • You can walk in nature or at the beach and let Mother Nature cleanse you.
  • You can listen to music that uplifts you or even chakra balancing CDs which help shift the blockages, making it easier to access them and release the emotion.
  • You can have a relaxing bath with salt in it to cleanse your energy body and release toxins. It helps to relax your muscles as well.
  • Body work – massage, reiki, etc, all helps as it aids the body to move out of its lethargic state and to let light and energy back in.
  • Breathing in gold light and seeing it flood your whole body – purifying it and cleansing it, also helps.
  • There are many activities that can help. Writing a diary, drawing or painting how you feel – it all helps shift the current low vibration of your body to a higher state.

The key is accessing and releasing the buried emotions as this is what keeps a person stuck in depression. They feel they can’t go on, they can’t face anything more as they feel they wouldn’t cope and it’s not worth the effort or risk to try. This type of thinking leads to fear and paralysis.

When your body is full of fear and you feel stuck, paralysed, unable to move forward, you are stuck in a freeze reaction. Your nervous system is overwhelmed and in a sense has shut down, it’s frozen and moved into collapse.

This is a normal process that occurs when a person has experienced or is in the process of experiencing trauma. You move through fight or flight into freeze and then into collapse.

In the frozen state, the body is still hoping the predator threatening you won’t see you and you’ll get to stay alive. You’re frozen, but still on hyperalert ready to flee if you get the chance. This is exhausting for the body as it uses up a lot of energy. It’s like you’ve got your foot on the brake and the gas pedal at the same time primed ready to act but staying still.

If escape seems impossible and death seems imminent you move into dissociation and collapse. Here your body is pumped full of natural endorphins, opioids, to numb you so you don’t feel the predator’s attack and what occurs to your body. This is why when you’re depressed you can feel detached, numb, not really present to what is occurring around you.

All of these bodily reactions are an innate mechanism that occurs at the subconscious level. You don’t choose to be numb and shutdown. Your body does it automatically to protect itself.

To come out of this state you need to calm your body so it feels safe again and can relax. One way to do that is by using Trauma and Tension Release Exercises (TRE). It is the body’s natural tremoring mechanism to release stress, tension and trauma. It can help calm your body down out of hyperarousal back through fight and flight, and down to calm relating, which is our natural baseline when we feel safe and supported.

Learning to witness your thoughts and watch them pass through your mind is another key. You don’t have to respond to the thoughts, be hooked by them, to go into the drama they try to create. Thank the thought and let it go.

Tell yourself positive messages –

  • ‘I choose to be kind and loving to myself now’.
  • Even though I have done things I am not proud of in the past, I am now choosing to behave differently’. ‘
  • Even though others I cared for didn’t seem to love me, I am choosing to love me now’.
  • ‘I am okay, I am worthy of love and life’.

beliefs thoughts actionsAll of these belief systems need to be programmed into the body and lots, lots more. Every negative self belief or belief about life can be changed. There are many ways to do this.

  • You can simply repeat the positive belief over and over until it becomes your new habit – like writing and displaying affirmations to help anchor it into your consciousness.
  • You can see a practitioner of the Lifeline Technique, Pysch-K or other modalities that reprogram the subconscious mind – literally replacing the old belief with the new one.
  • You can use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) also called Tapping to tap the new belief into your system

There are lots of ways to do it, but the key is to realise that it is these old, outdated negative thought patterns that keep a person feeling so flat and depressed. If their thoughts are really negative it is hard to motivate yourself into action. So it is here with the negative thoughts that change has to occur.

There are many tools you can use to help shift depression. It is just a matter of trying different things and finding what works best for you.

action out of stuckKnow that simply staying stuck won’t work. You need to take action to change your situation. Depression is so common in today’s world that no one will laugh or ridicule you for it. There is lots of help out there.

If your emotional pain is so deep that you become suicidal then it can be useful to go on anti-depressants temporarily to give your body a chance to relax and restrengthen, before you delve into processing the emotions. You will still need to go through them and release them, but building your stamina first can help.

Anti-depressants are not a cure, just a temporary dulling of the intensity of the emotions, so you don’t feel them so much. They numb you slightly to the pain and this can be beneficial for a short while. It is not beneficial long time as it will not help you to find peace, joy or excitement in life. With your doctor’s help you can reduce the anti-depressant while you learn new skills to support yourself to function more effectively.

Depression results from emotional pain and disappointments in life, so people who suffer it need love, support and encouragement from those around them. Be kind to all people you interact with, as everyone is going through their own challenges and all need kindness and love to help them through.

a-peaceful_view-1395934Peace is found once the old thinking and negative emotions are released. These are replaced with joy, passion, fun and happiness. It is possible. It is your natural state of being, just life’s experiences took you away from it. We can all regain balance and peace if we do the work needed to shift that which no longer serves us and to fill the space with that which does. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (10 July 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How do we heal from child abuse?

A child who was neglected, beaten, belittled or raped as a child will have grown with high levels of fear in their body. They will have learned to always be on guard, to watch out for danger, to not trust anyone and be alone. They have learned to focus on survival at the expense of joy, friendship and love. A child abused does not know how to relax and be peaceful. They don’t know how to receive or give love as that doesn’t feel safe. They have shut off from the softer sides of life and hardened themselves to cope with all the pain, grief, loss, anger, shame and rage. They are a powder-keg of emotions that are held together by strong armouring and defense mechanisms designed to protect them from experiencing further hurt.

To heal from child abuse all this damage needs to be undone so light can enter and soothe the dark spaces within, so love can enter and melt the sadness away, so peace can enter and joy can flood their cells returning them to their natural state of being.

Healing is a long process of becoming aware of the conditioning and patterning and allowing it to be dismantled. It takes courage to risk opening back up. It takes bravery to feel and release the buried emotions and it takes great commitment to continue unraveling layer upon layer of beliefs and armouring that have kept the person isolated and safe. It takes a lot of physical energy for the body to process these shifts as each layer drops away.

Children who have been abused often feel worthless, unloved, unwanted and not good enough. Healing involves changing these beliefs to realise the truth that you are loved, wanted, cared for and provided for. Life will bring experiences to help with these awakenings and help the individual to heal. Therapists and other practitioners can help speed the process up or help the person to understand what is occurring, so that they can go through it more easily rather than fighting / resisting the changes occurring.

be ur own heroIt takes great strength to be willing to soften to feel your vulnerability. For that is what is needed so you can access the truth of your inner being and clear out all the blockages within.

All the trauma and painful experiences are stored within the body, locked into the muscles and cells. This is a protective mechanism so that the child can cope / stay on the planet. If the pain / trauma is too much to process when it is occurring it gets locked into the body, to wait until a time when the person is strong enough and ready to process it. So, unfortunately it is all stored inside waiting for the person to feel and release it. This is why abused children can feel so cold, like stone, rigid, because they are literally locked up inside with all these challenging memories and feelings. This will soften in time as they release all that has been trapped inside. But there is no magic bullet, no wiping it all away. It has to be felt and released, the energy processed, so your body can relax back into its natural state of peace and joy. You have to do the work to get back to this.

Tension and Trauma Release Exercises helps hugely with this release of blocked, trapped energy within the body. TRE is a process that activates the body’s natural mechanism for releasing stress, tension and trauma. The body will systematically shake out the contractions and release the stiffness enabling the body to come back to life more, to move through the emotional residue and open back up to love, laughter and play.

As the buried tension and emotions are released the body starts to feel safer, no longer under threat as the old trauma activations are completed. The past is known as the past. It no longer feels like it could happen again at any moment. The hyper-vigilant defensiveness softens and the person is able to be in the now more fully, not distracted by the past or worrying about the future.

The safer the body feels, the more space there is to focus on what you actually want to do and be in life, instead of automatically reacting to triggers from the buried trauma and pain.

It is worth the effort to heal the trauma so you gain that freedom to be you, to enjoy your life and have fun. TRE is a great tool to help with this. With consistent use of TRE your body will slowly unwind the tension and trauma patterns so you can move forward.

As unfair as it seems children who have been abused make massive leaps and bounds in their evolution as they heal and reach peace within. A lot is asked of them to heal and find inner peace, but the reward is mighty. Unlike those not affected, those who were abused have a burning desire to heal. The healing process can become the primary drive in their life as they want to escape the pain and find peace, joy, love. It is a force that cannot be stopped. Hence, they evolve quite quickly in that lifetime, as opposed to someone who has had an easy life and feels no need to focus on healing or personal growth. So, as painful as it is, on the larger scale of things it is a gift, an invitation to wholeness, to learn forgiveness, mastery of your thoughts and emotions and connection with your heart and God.

Do not lose hope. Yes, there is a lot of work to do to heal from child abuse, but there is also a lot of help out there. You just have to find what works for you. Most will need a therapist of some type as you have to learn to trust another, to feel your emotions and speak your truth. This cannot be done on your own. Books can only help so much. Support groups are very beneficial as long as their focus is on healing and growth – not just on sharing wounded stories, sympathizing with each other, but not progressing.

quote-holding-on-to-anger-is-like-grasping-a-hot-coal-with-the-intent-of-throwing-it-at-someone-else-you-buddha-26643As anger and rage is worked through you will learn not to blame your parents or others. You will see they knew no better and often received the same treatment themselves. You will learn in time to forgive, not for the sake of the other person, but for your own sake. As if you hold onto resentment it is only your life that is affected with the bitterness and misery. You forgive to set yourself free, to no longer let the past affect you or that person control you.

forgivenessAs you process your emotions layer upon layer of issues related to various topics will arise. Forgiveness is not a once off act, but something you have to keep doing as you gain further insight into how much your life has been affected by the abuse. It takes a lot of strength to reach within and forgive the unforgivable.

Don’t waste energy trying to understand why something was done to you and perhaps not to your siblings. Do not go there! It was not about you. Abuse is about the perpetrator’s pain. They just take it out on you. It is their wounding that they are not coping with and it gets passed onto you to deal with. This happens generation after generation until one person says “Enough, this stops with me”. They commit to healing for their own sake and the sake of their current or future children. They break the link to abuse and heal the family dynamics so that future generations do not have to suffer from the unfinished business of their elder generations. Family karma is completed and the future generations freed from the tyranny. It is a brave soul that takes this healing journey on and there are many such brave souls on the planet now.

Know that you are supported to heal and grow. The right course, book, movie, song will occur to give you the necessary insight or tool to move forward. Time in nature can help soothe your soul and get in touch with what you are really feeling inside. There is a lot of support available today through websites, support groups, government funded programs, private practitioners and more.

You will be guided where you need to go. Trust. Seek help when you need it and go within to learn your truth, to see your freedom and opportunity for growth. Prayer and meditation help greatly, however, many people in the early stages find this hard as they feel foolish going within, speaking to a God who they feel has let them down, who should have protected them and kept them safe. For many there is a lot of rage and even hate for God. Others feel he/she does not exist. Each will work through this in time and come to realise that God is there, loving them, supporting them and smiling at their progress.

As souls we choose to incarnate and experience what we do, so we can grow and evolve. We choose the experiences and the other souls who would hurt us. We chose it to learn from and evolve through. God gives us free will to choose this, to go through these experiences. He/she will not interfere and stop it from happening for that would short circuit our evolution and growth. God sits waiting for us to call out for help and assistance, for us to invite him/her in. Then he/she can assist us, sending us to the right place or person for support, or helping us hear our inner guidance and what to do next.

While healing from child abuse is a long and painful process it is one that leads to liberation and freedom, massive amounts of personal growth and emotional intelligence. It is a path for higher guidance and quick evolution. It is a path only the brave walk and God is there waiting to hold our hand when we ask. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (24 June 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

What is the pull to evolve?

as above so belowThe pull to evolve is the desire to vibrate at the rate of Source Energy. Being stuck in painful emotions keeps you at a lower vibration. This is not your natural vibratory state and the tension between the two is like a stretched rubber band pulling your vibration back up to its natural state.

The urge to grow, heal and find peace is simply the urge to reunite with Source Energy. We all know subconsciously that our natural state is one of peace and it is only life’s dramas that pull us out of it. The urge to evolve is to escape that drama and come back to centre, to peace. It is homeostasis of our vibration – our set-point – that the body tries to regulate itself to.

We take ourselves further and further away from it when we are focused in our heads rushing about and busy. When in that state we don’t notice nature and its stillness, its peace. We are moving too frantically. Ironically moving so fast in an attempt to have time at the end of the day to relax and be at peace, to unwind and be still. We could be that all the time if we chose a less hectic lifestyle, if we focused more on our hearts and our connection with self, Source/God/Universe/Whatever. When we feel that connection we feel at ease. Like when you have spent days in nature – you automatically slow down and feel peaceful. This is how nature helps us heal. It slows us down and raises our vibration. Sitting in nature allows density to drop away and vibration to raise.

So the urge to evolve is simply the body-mind trying to recapture its natural state of peace and bliss. When you do connect in at that higher level your mind is quiet enough that you can access guidance from your soul or higher self – the parts of you that are vibrating at a higher level and they guide you as to actions you can take to align yourself with Source. Each person has a different destiny, a different activity or purpose for their life.

What may be peaceful to one person may be boring or hard to another. We each have to find what it is that makes our heart sing, the activity that when we do it time flies by and we don’t even notice it passing. That is a sign of deep immersion or connection with Source. So each person’s path is different based on their joys, their passions, their ideas. It will vary lifetime to lifetime based on what the soul is focused on learning or completing. There is no God up there directing the show as such. It is just Source Energy evolving through us, reaching towards completion and that occurs when we manage to vibrate at that higher level and match Source Energy as much as we can. It takes many lifetimes to achieve and that is the evolutionary process, that is what is occurring and why so many people are drawn to esoteric studies, to personal growth and spirituality.

They know there is something more to life than the mundane rat race. They know they could feel a lot better than they do. They know they could enjoy life more than they have. This is the evolutionary pulse pulling everyone forward. It is like clock work, all proceeding at the right time and space as was designed prior to incarnation. It is all set ready to be played out. Therefore you can not mess it up or miss out on anything you were meant to experience. So relax and let life lead you to where you need to go. Don’t exhaust yourself trying to figure it all out. Relax, trust, quieten your mind and listen to your intuition and your heart. Hear its messages and take actions that you feel guided to take and which bring you greater joy. Life is about joy. We forget that. We forget how to play and enjoy life. As kids we know it is important and just do it. As adults we have been taught to be more serious, responsible and deadened – energetically we are deadened when we do not follow our heart, our aliveness, our joy and passion.

So let your heart open, let your vibration rise and have fun in life. That is how it is meant to be. God/Source will pull you forward to become all you are meant to be. The jobs, people, etc will appear at the right time and place. You will be guided to them. Trust. All is taken care of. All is organised. You just haven’t realised it. So enjoy it – all the good and the bad – and allow life to lead you forward, to help you raise your vibration and evolve to Source Consciousness, then your lifetime is complete. Not everyone will reach it this lifetime. It depends on what each person is here to learn.They may learn those lessons then leave, returning at a later date to continue their evolution towards Source Consciousness.

We are all walking the same path. There is no higher or lower beings. It is just a scale of consciousness and all people will complete the scale at some point. It is our destiny. It is the evolution of consciousness within our species. It is life on Earth. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (23 June 2015).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

Loving a situation into peace

When feeling blue it is tempting to look for something to fix and change, to push the low feelings away. However, that doesn’t work – it’s a form of rejecting ourselves and our feelings – which just makes us feel worse. Instead we need to sit with and feel our feelings, then they will shift. This is the advice my higher self gave me on how to love a situation into peace (5 Nov 2014).

Life will always have its ups and downs. You are learning not to let them get you off centre and if they do to balance up quickly. No need for fix-it mode. It is a normal reaction to be upset to challenging situations – just honour your feelings and body’s needs and turn your thoughts positively as soon as you can. You exhaust yourself by pushing to heal, by judging your reaction as not okay and desiring joyous feelings straight away. Instead of fighting / changing what is – love it, love it into peace. That will nourish you, instead of exhaust you.

Peaceful-Radio-slider-1How do I love a situation into peace?

Accept it. Acknowledge it as a part of your evolutionary growth, leading you somewhere higher/brighter. It is helping you evolve, clearing out residue. Accept the stuckness or low feelings and trust it will alter when it is meant to. Ask your higher self and the Angels to assist you in finding balance within. Breathe in coloured light, talk to your sub-personalities – comfort yourself / selves. Send love to your heart and mind.

Do these things to honour yourself, comfort yourself – not to fix / change. It is about loving what is, knowing it will change in time. It is a receiving / accepting process, not an active / forceful process.

What constitutes a healthy relationship?

A healthy relationship is one in which both parties attain greater wisdom and self awareness. This occurs through using all situations to reflect on their conditioning and subconscious beliefs. The beloved is a mirror to your consciousness showing you your areas for growth and insight. Each triggers the other to provide them with the opportunity to heal and grow together towards the light and God-likeness.

It is a dance of growth, a sharing, a connected togetherness. It is not a clingy we, but a grander version of you and I. Together they dance and sing through life helping each other to grow. They share their insights, their feelings and dreams. They share their inner most thoughts and have no fear of rejection as they know the other does the same, and together they look after each others vulnerability. You hold my hand and I hold yours. I choose to be here for you and you choose to be here for me too.

It is a mutual reciprocity of love and acceptance. They see each others potential for growth and improvement, but rather than judge harshly, they love who the person is now and see them expanding/evolving into their authentic self. They love the person fully which enables the other to feel safe enough to be themselves. They let their defenses down and can be in touch with their heart, their true authentic self and become that in the world.

It is an honoring of two souls who have come together to share and learn. There may be challenges, but they are seen as an opportunity for reflection and growth, to get to know the inner workings of each other at a new level.

These relationships are common, not rare. However they are often overlooked as too easy or simple. We have been conditioned as human beings to look for Mr Right / Mrs Right, the perfect one to meet all our needs and rescue us from our life. Prince Charming and Cinderella type stories. But this is not love, this is not real life. For that type of rescuing does not help you grow. It is an unhealthy relationship where the Prince is a pseudo-parent figure taking responsibility and the damsel in distress stays a weak, dependent child. That is not an example of a healthy relationship.

A better example would be Hansel and Gretel who are not needy, but co-exist, they live together and grow together day by day. I hear you all shouting but they are brother and sister. Yes, these relationships that support growth can be siblings or friends. It doesn’t have to be just romantic partnerships. Let go of the fantasy of romance. It is fine as a concept, but know that it fades, know that as you get to know your partner you will see things you don’t like. It is meant to be that way. The honeymoon phase of the relationship has to end for the true inner work to happen.

When you are pushing each others buttons that is when insight can occur. You can reflect on when else in life have you felt that same way. You may realise your parents treated you in a similar manner and you adopted a belief about yourself as a result. If you no longer want to attract that same kind of treatment change your belief about yourself and what you will attract will change. Learn to set boundaries and speak your truth about how you do want to be treated and make sure you are treating yourself that way. Do you really love and respect yourself? Do you meet your own emotional needs? Do you take care of yourself well? If you don’t it is madness to expect someone else will.

Do your inner work to heal and find peace and your life will be much more peaceful and balanced. There are many ways to centre and ground yourself to go within, to connect with your heart and inner guidance. One way I have found particuarly useful at clearing out stress, tension and trauma so that I can sit in stillness and listen within for my truth and guidance is Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE). It helps to move your body out of reactivity – anger, fear – back down into calm relating where it is easier to connect with others heart to heart.

A healthy relationship is one where each party takes responsibility for healing their own issues and meet together in wholeness.

They don’t judge or project their stuff onto each other. Instead they share what they have learned and give thanks for the support they give to each other. They thank God for their lives and the chance to evolve and grow. They stay open to change knowing life will guide them forward to higher and higher levels of growth and service to the whole.

They are interdependent, capable of being on their own, but choosing to be together. There is no neediness or dependency, and if a time comes when one decides to go their separate ways, they celebrate what they have shared and walk away without regrets. They know each will find the next person they are to learn and grow with when the time is right. There are no guaranteed commitments for life. Couples stay together while they have more to learn from each other. When the learning is done they may go their separate ways. There is no fear of this, just trust and love.

For a healthy person knows they will always be connected energetically to their loved ones no matter how far they roam and it is their connection with them self and God that really counts. Those are the true, permanent commitments and they are the only ones you need. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (18 June 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and HEALING FROM CHILD ABUSE pages of this website.

The difference between our higher self and our soul

I asked my higher self what the difference was between it and my soul. This is what I channeled (7 Aug 2014).

Source: http://www.kuthumi-hands.com
Source: http://www.kuthumi-hands.com

Your soul is your larger existence, the consciousness that is evolving and is at a certain stage of awakening based on all of your life experiences. I, the higher self, am the awakened one, the aware one, the part of you that still knows God. Your soul is the sum total of all the jigsaw pieces you have collected (so to speak) and I am the whole completed puzzle.

You become me as you become all that is. I am the completed one, the bigger picture guiding you forth. Your soul is the sum total so far, it has wounds to heal from past lives, gifts to uncover from them too, much to learn and integrate. I hope this is sufficiently clear for you to understand.

Yes, thank you. And talking to my soul is different to this?

Yes very different. You need to tune into your soul and connect with it to get its messages. You can write them like this just be clear in your intent. Amen.

My soul?

Yes, I do want to talk to you. I’m scared by your progress. I still fear going too fast, too much too quickly. I’d rather hide and avoid the truth. Each lifetime you clear some of this and open up further, become more willing to live in God’s light and soul. Me i’m still hesitant.

Why?

Because it is emotionally painful going through the lessons. I know it is a game and not really real, but it still hurts. I’m tired from it all. I’d rather not play, but you push forth each time determined to progress quickly and enhance your status, which doesn’t even exist. It is all silly, very silly. I’d rather just BE.

What can I do to make it easier for you?

Fly home occasionally to the temple of light and be recharged. John of God will help a lot, connecting you with Source more. No need to second guess these messages. TRUST. It is all okay. It is me you are evolving. Your higher self knows all is okay. I’m the one who doesn’t know it fully / completely. Be with me. Look after me. Send love and light to me. I need it too. Thank you for listening.

[Note: Jodi-Anne attended the John of God event in Sydney 2014 and received multiple healings that enabled her to let go of much of her fear and open up to sharing these messages with humanity. While still hesitant she is ready to move forward and has done so continuously. She purchased a John of God crystal light bed which helps a person to release their baggage and awaken to their true self. She uses this regularly and soon will open it up for clients to use as well.]

When you don’t know what to do…… do this

My higher self gave me this advice on what to do when I don’t know what to do…(22 Sept 2014).

When you don’t know what to do – ask God – instead of going into fear, panic, control.

  • Breathe deeply deep-breath1
  • Surrender the situation to God
  • Ask for help from the Angels
  • Listen for answers
  • Act – based from the heart, what would love do now?
  • Invite in colours, solar light to assist. Surround the scene and all involved with love and light
  • Talk heart to heart with their souls
  • Be at peace – mirror peace to others, so they too can find that space / vibration
  • Send love to those parts of you that feel nervous. Reassure them that they are safe and okay. Invite Angels to hold their hands, help them heal, go play